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Teen Poetry #5
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Wicced_Witch
Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 110
Clarksville, TN, USA

0 posted 2002-06-10 05:04 PM



For Sherri...

Dark clouds move in overhead,
Casting shadows below.
Raindrops are falling down,
Soaking my cheeks, my pillow.

Scared, I run and hide.
Running away from pain,
Hiding from the truth,
With nothing to gain.

The creature finds me still.
Heartbreak come to life.
Claws ripping into my chest,
Sharper than any knife.

I scream out, more rain falls.
My heart ripped into shreds,
The darkness closes in.
Love, once strong, is now dead.

© Copyright 2002 Stephanie Elliott - All Rights Reserved
SlowDrag
Member
since 2002-01-10
Posts 53
Tx...need i say more
1 posted 2002-06-10 05:39 PM


It was dark...but i liked it....i generally try to focus on happy thoughts (oh my god i sound like a self help freak)...LOL i just try to steer away from depression but i really liked this...a lot of feeling.

and all i wanna do is be there for the things you're going through....well is it good for you?...is it good for you?

Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2002-06-10 08:59 PM


Yeah, very well written. I really thought you captured the feel of a morbid, depressing poem extemely well. I liked it a lot.

This message has been brought to you by the letter 'Y'

Skyfire
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Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
3 posted 2002-06-10 09:53 PM


"Love, once strong, is now dead"

Oh wow. In my opinion, that is the most powerful line in the entire poem. Well written indeed.

Wicced_Witch
Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 110
Clarksville, TN, USA
4 posted 2002-06-20 02:29 PM


Thanks everyone.  I was really in a bad mood when I wrote this.  My girl had just come home and said it's over, move out.  This poem started my healing.


Steffanie

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