Teen Poetry #5 |
![]() ![]() |
cell |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
laconic Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 64Melbourne, Australia |
Lash out at the world with my knife in hand break my bonds of steel, to spread my contraband they censored me and tore me down but instead of falling i stood my ground in the pits of darkness where i lost my hope i heard a voice tortured that softly spoke "in everything we do, the odds are collected turned against us when we least expect it in yourself you can believe, but alone you can't achieve so know your place in this world of haste and rise above it, see the contours of your life's plan awaitng the day, when all things become clear have paitenice my dear..." the world is torn from beneath my feet my freedom decapitated i seek retreat but in this hollow cell i only have sleep as i close my eyes everything dies for a night at least... |
||
© Copyright 2002 Luke Zhang - All Rights Reserved | |||
LCBS Senior Member
since 2001-11-29
Posts 532Connecticut |
This was written really well, you should know the importance of hope, hope is what keeps mankind alive. Great Write... ~Lisa |
||
quietlydying![]() ![]()
since 2001-06-10
Posts 935the wonderful land of oz |
i really enjoyed the wording in this piece. /jen/ so foul and fair a day i have not seen. - macbeth act 1, scene 3 |
||
xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
"but in this hollow cell i only have sleep as i close my eyes everything dies for a night at least..." sometimes for me, my sleep is my only safe haven...i loved this..keep up the great work iTs bEeN 1 Of ThOsE dAyZ 4 2 MaNY dAyZ nOw..I jUst NeEd a DaY whErE tHe WOrLd cAn tAkE cArE of ItsElf.. |
||
keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
Yeah, I liked this. I want to see more stuff like this around here. Very cool Jon "Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur |
||
Kielo Senior Member
since 2002-02-11
Posts 1109 |
Wow... this was excellent, and the ending was definately the best part. ![]() |
||
![]() ![]() |
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |