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SlowDrag
Member

since 2002-01-10

Posts 53
Tx...need i say more

0 posted 2002-01-24 09:44 PM

this is a song i'm working on, not even near finished but tell me what you think of so far.

i rehearsed
every word,
that i would say
to make you mine

i wanted to make you feel
the way i feel,
convince you now
that it was real.

when the words came out,
you turned away,
my heart fell out,
when it heard you say.

"i just dont feel the same.
I'm sorry.
it will just bring pain,
i'm so sorry.
i can't change the way i feel
and i'm sorry."
but you can't tell me its not real,
i'm not sorry.

"Pardon me while I throw up, I guess some people never grow up..."

[This message has been edited by SlowDrag (01-24-2002 09:45 PM).]

rubberband
Junior Member

since 2002-01-04

Posts 26
Will be half Swiss one day

1 posted 2002-01-24 10:10 PM

That is great so far. That would make a beautiful song!

Put your past behind you, not you past in front of you!

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

2 posted 2002-01-26 11:39 PM

Really good poem hun...sometimes i really think people should feel the damage they have caused upon us...and you expressed that well

yOu GeT wAt u PaId 4 bUt i JuS hAd nO..iNtEnTion oF liVin tHis waY --Counting crows

Jenabou
Member

since 2000-06-13

Posts 215
Oklahoma/Nova Scotia Canada/USA

3 posted 2002-01-27 07:40 PM

i really like this
you've put your feelings into words really well I can totally tell how you're feeling,..and I'm sorry
but this is gonna make an awesome song!

*for someone who's used to heartache,losing it all was just a matter of time*
Be kind,for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle

DancinQueen

Senior Member

since 2000-07-29

Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA

4 posted 2002-01-27 10:39 PM

ooo i really liked this. great job..wish i could hear it to music someday. awesome job

*dq

**You can't always trust the people you want to**

punkrockerrobin

Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 1180
Sparks, NV

5 posted 2002-01-28 02:52 AM

great job! i enjoyed this one! tks for sharing.
robin

i have a wish but only a certain guy can fufill it!

TopGunLauren
Senior Member

since 2000-08-02

Posts 718
California

6 posted 2002-01-31 01:13 AM

This is awsome i really love it.
Lauren

"I just needed someone to talk to you were just to busy with yourself."-Staind

"You've got to get yourself together you got stuck in a moment and y

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

7 posted 2002-01-31 09:47 PM

I like what you have so far... I would love to see the finished product.
Well done

--Marie

I wish your fingers could touch all I can't say... no one should ever feel this alone.

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

8 posted 2002-02-01 07:52 AM

i like what youve got so far eric...its got a nice flow to it.....do you have a band to go with it?

eyes...........feeel...D
rooop
Y
..zzzzz...

luckyducky_505
Member

since 2001-04-29

Posts 53
Kentucky, USA

9 posted 2002-02-01 04:32 PM

I really like the song so far -- I'm a singer so I look for things on here! Yours is great, you should get it to a recordign studio!

If you wanna be somebody, If you wanna go somewhere, you gotta wake-up and pay attention. ~Sister Act 2~
~Whoopi Goldberg~

Ceinwyn
Member Elite

since 2000-07-09

Posts 2175
VA

10 posted 2002-02-02 02:38 PM

All I can say is so far so good

*hears it on the radio*

Kristen

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