Teen Poetry #5 |
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A really good one! (untitled as of yet) |
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Skyfire![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding ![]() |
Will you ever love me The way I need to be loved? Will you ever hug me The way I need to be hugged? Will you ever kiss me The way I want to be kissed? Will it be you with whom I find romantic bliss? Will you ever hurt me The way I've been hurt before? Will you ever hate me So it's you that I abhor? Will we ever argue Like I did with him? Will you ever make my life So incredibly, horribly, dim? Will I ever want you The way I want the new guy? How long will it really be Until we say good-bye? Will I get a red rose Or just get friendship yellow? Will we be very passionate Or will we be quite mellow? If you define cowardice as running away and screaming at the first sign of danger, then yes, Mister Brave Man, I guess I am a coward. |
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© Copyright 2001 Rhonda Adolph - All Rights Reserved | |||
NathanS Member
since 2001-09-27
Posts 106CA |
Very nice ![]() ~applause~ |
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Acies![]()
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Doesn't life have so many questions needed to be answered? I just hope you do find the answers thanks for sharing hi Sweets/puff puff/bubbles ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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anonymous albert ?![]()
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
i agree so many question so few answers...the poem was nice...great job. =) |
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Marshalzu![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Great read Skyfire, thanks for sharing ![]() Andrew "Ph33r Me I eat N00bies Ph0R bReakFAsT" |
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holatuwol Member
since 2001-04-27
Posts 72California, USA |
CUTE! ^^ This poem was cute! Majorly cute! Except the ending didn't seem to be fulfilling... ^^; For some reason, the pairs of lines in of themselves seemed really cute, but I thought a different ordering of them might have given a stronger effect... o.o; But how it should be ordered generally would pend on your mood, I suppose. The poem seems to be like a mind musing over various thoughts... ^^ And in that, it has lots of charm, and because of that charm, this poem was really cute! ^__^ I still think that the effect could be better if the ending was different... not stronger or weaker, but different... it had the right tone, but the wrong words, I guess you could say... ^^; I'm bad at clarification... but, I think that overall, the thoughts were cute, but the arrangement didn't seem to flow well... 'cept for maybe the beginning. ^_^ In any case, I liked this one! Another decent love poem in a sea of evil ones which don't make sense... it used and played on a lot of clichés, but nevertheless, they were combined in a tasteful manner, making it relatively enjoyable. ^_^ Thank you muchlies for the read, and look forward to others of yours. Until next time! - holatuwol |
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never_a_princess Member
since 2001-06-09
Posts 82Show Me the Money |
Excellent poem!! I love all the questions, and I like the transition from questions of love to hate and so forth. Rock on! __o0o_Anna_o0o__ *waves* Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly. |
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xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
I really liked this poem...i hope he never hurts you the way u've been hurt before!!! But i hope ya get all the good stuff ![]() ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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