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Open Poetry #14
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Children of War
| Open Poetry #14 |
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Children of War |
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Lisann Member
since 2001-01-31
Posts 350 |
I have never been a soldier But I know what war is like Having survived a childhood Besieged by enemies more dangerous and insiduous Than those armies face with guns. My enemies were alcoholism and abuse. And I was unarmed. I never got just the one year tour of duty In some battle-torn country. I was there for the duration of 12 years, Escaping like a prisoneer of war Only to be snapped back in the fold When they would find me Or, I broke down and told. Just like a soldier Who has no life of his own. I was Children's Aid's possession Theirs to send wherever they wanted. From foster home to foster home When the burden of raising me Pushed them to the limit. But, It wasn't rest and relaxation for me. Because no matter where I went The disease ran rampant Through my family. From foster home to foster home. With no love or family to provide me with. Damn this system--- You have failed me once too often. Bedroom inspections were always on Tuesday. If everything was perfect I could go outside and play. But, A paper out of place Or a messy bed I would pay dearly. What does a 6 year old know about hospital corners? Normal childhood activities like play? Not this child. I was always combat ready. Training myself to survive. I had to be on guard------ ALERT. Nighttime was the worst. But, Unlike armed camps There wasn't any sentries laying in my bed. Hovering between exhaustion and sleep, Listening for the intruder To come into my room. Or waking to find that he had already infiltrated And was laying on top of me. How could I do anything else except play dead? My childhood was a war zone. As frightening and devestating as vietnam. A battleground of fear Where discord and conflict were the rules. Once in a while, When I allow the feelings stored since childhood Bubble to the surface---- I have a hard time keeping them under control I immediately want to fight or flee. Destroy something. Sometimes............................. Even me. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Lisann - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
yes, Lisann, you had your war, and are just as battered as the worst of the ones with the flashbacks and the scars, but I feel you are and will overcome and rise to heights so far above that you will be able to help others know and believe in something better n this world...gentle smile [This message has been edited by Logan (edited 07-03-2001).] |
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Lisann Member
since 2001-01-31
Posts 350 |
Thank you Logan. As it turns out, I also believe that I have a lot to offer others and that I have the ability, insight and love to help others so I opened my own forum for incest survivors. Hopefully this will help others to overcome their own battles and help end the violence. Thank you for your reply |
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Auguste 
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Lisann, And I believe that opening this forum will also be a great help. I think you have far to go and will be a source of strength to many. Michael Michael Auguste~ |
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cpalmer Senior Member
since 2001-06-26
Posts 977Phoenix, Az |
Lisann, I am so impressed by your strength and courage...I believe in writing and talking out these kind of problems...I will have to check out your other site where do I find it? Cindi God is our inspiration; Words of the heart can be music to our ears |
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Lisann Member
since 2001-01-31
Posts 350 |
Cpalmer. The address is www.ezboard.com and the board name is incest survivors speak out. |
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