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Open Poetry #13
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Reverie
| Open Poetry #13 |
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Reverie |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven 
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Friday night jazz Heineken by the bottle a duet performing old standards half-heartedly Dirty windows obscure an even dirtier river love will wait another night as blenders mix with strings and ivory or am I just thirsty ? Still the rhythm moves me while everyone else sits dancing with only their words which move only themselves The duet plays on oblivious to black-eyed sharks making empty promises over half-empty glasses of warm beer And it’s too late and it’s too sad to think of you now and the reality of these feelings for you which conjure visions of a green sea and blue jeans All the while my eyes burn as smoke smothers me and I seek to erase these words that animate thoughts of yesterday’s children and tomorrow’s debts Turning I look for another round another song needing neither and disappointed by both Just a few more chords until my eyes close and tomorrow arrives without you but I know dreams will recall what time has forgotten There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Jamie Patterson - All Rights Reserved | |||
Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
...and it's too late and it's too sad somehow, those two lines jumped out...perhaps because it sounded like an old song from days gone by. Well done! |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I loved your poem, but felt the pain in it, and I being older I guess, know this...that it is never too late, never. Great poem. |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
heartfelt words. I've read it several times . Charisma |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I could smell the smoke...hear the music..and feel the pain.....excellent sir. |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
well done. . . you've conveyed the image well. . . ------------------------------------------------------ To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
You know I love this...welcome to the world of contemporary writing hon - yup...that's what it is... miss you...  KAll obscurity starts with a danger: |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Very, very nice...James |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
And it’s too late and it’s too sad to think of you now and the reality of these feelings for you You certainly know how to make a woman sigh Jamie Loved it my friend. Maree  |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
Happy dreams. Joyce |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Just a few more chords until my eyes close and tomorrow arrives without you but I know dreams will recall what time has forgotten ... Absolutely well-strung chrods these... Much enjoyed this, my friend, Jamie, Regards, sudhir |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Lady: thanks,,..it's too late baby now??--lol -- you don't want to hear me sing-- Mysteria: I am glad you liked it...(ps..i just meant too late at night )Charisma: thanks for reading it even once  Sharon: Of course you could hon,, I mean,, you are psychic yanno... thanks kind lady Sven: thank you very much! K Me? Contemporary?  Your free versing has corrupted me....heh.... ( i suppose i should thank you..~shrug~ so..thanks ) I miss you!James: Thank you. Maree: You aren't entirely without blame yanno...lol-- thanks for the sighs... Joyce: Thanks, and to you also... Sudhir: Thanks my friend ( whom I see way too little of these days btw....) Take care |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Jamie...maybe she is just across that smokefilled room...or across the street...but she is there for someone as wondeful as you |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
You know hon - I think this is perhaps my favourite, this and 'Largos' I'm doing the re-reading thing tonight..truly, the atmosphere is amazing..and I can so see you there...this just means so much... love K[This message has been edited by Severn (edited 06-06-2001).] |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
maybe one day we shall both sit at the table where it was written hk>lk |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
yes..sigh |
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