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Open Poetry #13
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Poetic Mockery (or Undiagnosed)
| Open Poetry #13 |
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Poetic Mockery (or Undiagnosed) |
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Auguste 
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea 
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Poetic Mockery by Michael Fate's shadows seep into my life and cast their pall on thought. These trembling hands shall never write such poems as they have wrought. The neuro-blocker's side effects, a tragic handicap. My mind's confused, can't concentrate and energy does sap. So hard it is to write a poem, sometimes to even think. Forgetful have I now become, Depressed, I try not sink. I wonder if I should retire, my thoughts are such a haze, to never write a poem again, spend time in other ways. Four thousand milligrams I take that turns each day to dream. Everything is not quite real, like brain has ripped a seam. I'm sentenced for the rest of life, from nightmare, I can't wake. Dose increases every week so I have more to take. They treat the symptoms, not the cause, it is a mystery. So dose by dose my mind does go and I lose what was me. Fifteen months ago I woke to excruciating pain. The doctors have still not determined the cause. To help control the pain I take a neuro-blocker. It's not a pain pill. A neuro-blocker slows down impulses from the nerves to the brain, trying to trick the brain into believing that the body is not in pain. It helps, but the pain persists. I used to be very active and spent most of my time outdoors hiking, panning for gold, running foot races with my young son. Though I can still walk a little, sometimes with the aid of a cane, most of my time is now spent in a wheelchair. The doctors say that I will be in it for the rest of my life. I don't need your sympathy. That's not why I posted the poem. I posted it so that you'd better understand the man behind the poetry. I posted it because poetry is a very honest art form and some things just need to be said. I wish you all my best and please know that dreams are within everyone's reach, including my own. Bless you all and believe in yourselves. I believe in you.  Michael Proust- |
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| © Copyright 2001 Michael Auguste - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
Oh, Michael. I know you don't want my sympathy, but how about my empathy. I am healthy for my age, but I can only do so much before my back gives out and makes me rest. It is so frustrating when one has always been so active. I am very fortunate though, I don't have to take any medicine. I am allergic to aspirin so I don't even take that. Medicines sometimes cause as much trouble as they relieve, but science is improving every day and don't give up your poetry. I am sure you'll always be able to compose poetry. Love, Joyce |
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Sami Junior Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 49Ontario, Canada |
sometimes people take their health for granted, not thinking that one day they might end up sick...i do feel for you and only ever wish you the best...my thoughts and prayers will be with you and keep writing because you write the most amazing poetry... ~Sami~ 'Sometimes we think it's holding on that makes us strong, but sometimes it's letting go' ~~Sam Ewing |
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elizabeth anne Member
since 2001-03-29
Posts 83 |
Oh Michael, your health has suffered but your heart has grown... Elizabeth Anne |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
we believe in you as well Michael. . . thank you for sharing. . . and for showing us what we already know. . . that you are indeed a wonderful person and an incredible poet. . . ------------------------------------------------------ To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
As we also believe in you Michael, and thank you for sharing and showing us your heart. I can have empathy for your circumstances as it was not all that long ago that I also dealt with a loved one having an unexplained illness of this type. God Bless you Michael. On the wings of words our spirits fly....and our souls are free. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Michael--Your strength is not in your legs, but in your spirit. Hugs! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Poetry may be a "very honest art" but the person behind the poem must be a very brave soul to put it out to begin with, as poetry reflects our inner selves, probably better than any other art form. I shall not give you my sympathy, but you do have my prayers that the medical world will find something to help you with your illness. Meanwhile, as you allow your words to drape Passions, I for one, shall be here to read, and enjoy, your gifts. |
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Auguste
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Joyce, Empathy is fine, as I also have the same for anyone suffering from a bad back. That can really be a misery at times and prevent a person from doing the things they'd like and need to do. Before falling ill I'd never had to take any kind of medicine. To do so now is really a bother, not only with the side effects, but because I'm not used to having to schedule doses of anything. I wish you well and thank you very much. Sami, I was one of those people that took their health for granted. I guess when you're a physically active person in all around good shape, it's impossible to believe that you could awaken one day to have all of that taken away. Oh well... I'll make do with what I've got and continue on. Even handicapped, each day is such a wonderful gift. Thank you. Sven, I want to thank you, sincerely, for your very kind words. They mean so much to me. Since poetry truly is an honest art, just let me say thatin your own I see a kind, compationate person and an excellent writer. I mean that. Gentle Spirit, Thank you for reading this. May God also bless you. Martie, I absolutely agree. As we've discussed in the past, I am very fortunate in many, many ways. I honestly believe that. I'll do just fine. Thank you, my friend. Karilea, You're very sweet, but I really don't consider myself to be brave by any stretch of the imagination. I'm just not a quitter. I intend to make my life as full as it possibly can be and I know that I will be successful. Thank you, my friend. You are also in my prayers. Proust- |
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