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Dark Poetry #3
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Remember when
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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Remember when |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Remember When Two can play this game believe it or not. I can disappear anytime I want. Now you see me, now you don't. It's me saying I will but I won't. Remember when you said "I want to spend time with you but I have no time right now?" I was thinking maybe we could move this relationship to another life, another time, another planet. A place where we could have some time to figure this out somehow. JamesLee July04 2003 |
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| © Copyright 2003 JamesMichael - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Mad_Hatter Member
since 2003-06-29
Posts 393Canada |
I liked this poem. It was a kind of odd transition from the begining of the poem to the end. Very nice. |
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Alnilam Member
since 2003-07-04
Posts 75 |
I loved this poem. Touched my heart with every line. Keep up the great writting. |
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Ladybug Member
since 2003-06-17
Posts 236Massachusetts |
Great poem, love this: "I was thinking maybe we could move this relationship to another life, another time, another planet. A place where we could have some time to figure this out somehow." Very full of emotion. It was interesting how your rhyme scheme changed, but it worked great.  Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end... |
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Dark Kisses Member
since 2001-06-24
Posts 364Flat lands of Kansas |
Okay strange enough but I feel this poem was written from my own mind at this moment. I know exactly how it feels. I just started a new relationship yet he seems to have no time for me. Unless it is on his terms. Here I am 32 yo... too old for games, I guess. Thanks for the read |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thank you Mad hatter, Alnilam, Ladybug and Dark Kisses for the nice responses... So in other works Dark Kisses you get along fine as long as everything is his way? Yikes...Sounds like a nice relationship for someone thats desperate...and at times I have been...but not for too long...james |
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dertah Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584 |
great write. wish i could do the same with my love. |
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Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
yes I like this a lot. Few people in open are dark enough for my taste, but you made it. If art is still inside, I feel it |
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eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
i like this a lot as i usually do with your writing, nice... "in a past life i was a woodcarver's knife: the sharpend blade of a wood cutter, the eldest son of the chief's brother: a maker of drums" |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
nice to see you in here. Unfortunately, I can relate to this right now.  This seems different for you. Enjoyed. You could hurt me with your bare hands. You could hurt me using the sharp edge of what you say. JEWEL |
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Dark Kisses Member
since 2001-06-24
Posts 364Flat lands of Kansas |
Desperate is not the word I would use here. Just getting use to this relationship. I am glad to say , things have changed though. (YEAH) He is a wonderful man... just been hurt like everyone else in this world. Everything takes some time. But thanks for your concern  A friend, like a candle, is most needed in the darkness. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Dark Kisses...I think I'm the one thats desperate...I was involved in a relationship where everything was beautiful as long as she got her way...but one day I decided that I would be getting my way...yeah, maybe on a cold dark night...in another life, or another time, but it definately isn't going to happen if she has any say so...so she doesn't...but this is all old news... glad things are good for you...James |
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