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JenniX
Junior Member

since 2003-06-05

Posts 29

0 posted 2003-06-20 02:48 PM

Angels once glowed of life,
but now are darkened,
the once golden crown,
changes to black.
Shows their sorrow,
towards my lost soul.
They once guarded me,
with their happiness,
but I changed them,
turned them to hate God,
love the devil of evil,
darkened by my hatred.
My guardians once tried to change me,
force me to the light,
to God.
I was already lost to him,
for the devil welcomed me more,
I pulled them with me,
to the depths of hell,
away from the light of heaven.
The once golden angels guarded my soul,
I am now lost to them,
to the Lord of heaven.
I belong in hell,
away from ny beloved angels,
for I will destroy them if I stay,
in the shine of heaven,
so I retreat to the depths of hell.

click1
Member

since 2003-03-25

Posts 152
usa

1 posted 2003-06-20 10:43 PM

I like your form..
YOU have my attention
So hard to say..

Click

IntoTheFlames
Member

since 2003-06-21

Posts 92
Va, USA

2 posted 2003-06-21 01:14 AM

Needless to say this poem captures the attention of the reader. It radiates a feeling of utter turmoil and sadness. You did an unbelievable job!!

mysticpoe
Senior Member

since 2003-02-28

Posts 883

3 posted 2003-06-22 12:18 PM

I've read other poems relating to the dissatisfaction with God. But with this write you have instilled retention through out the entire poem. Nice write, although I hope I never feel this way. But who knows, for we are all human and subject to that purpose.

mysticpoe

If nothing is something
then everything is
our thoughts and feelings
and all that exists.

JenniX
Junior Member

since 2003-06-05

Posts 29

4 posted 2003-06-22 09:40 PM

I agree fully with you, utter turmoil is not fun especially if you have to hide. try not to fall into deep darkness stay in the light.
JenniX

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

5 posted 2003-06-23 12:11 PM

Nice

rapturedmist
Junior Member

since 2003-06-23

Posts 30
USA

6 posted 2003-06-23 01:43 PM

I'm not sure what to put here. This captures an emotion that I can't quite figure out yet. Koodos -nods head in statisfaction-
-RM

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