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Dark Poetry #3

This Thing called life

ladypisces76
Junior Member

since 2003-05-16

Posts 10
Maine,USA

0 posted 2003-05-29 04:45 PM

In this life there is so much pain
It comes and goes just like the rain
The darkness slowly turns to light
Like the morning time returns to night
There is no begining nor an end
This thing called life is all pretend.

aran
Junior Member

since 2003-05-18

Posts 34

1 posted 2003-05-29 06:02 PM

This is ok;

Couplets get a little boring after they've been done over and over again, but you've breathed a little life into the old form.

I am hopeful that from here there will be much improvement

peaceful_dreamer
Member

since 2003-04-25

Posts 159
SoMeWhErE oVeR tHe RaInBoW

2 posted 2003-05-30 09:10 PM

i love this so much! it ends so perfectly, yet i didn't want it to end! GREAT job!!!

there are 2 ways of spreading light: to be the candle, or the mirror that reflects it. -unknown

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