Dark Poetry #3 |
Can't Stop |
eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
Can't stop I sit here and wait Like a fool to his fate Writhing in this hate There's only one escape I bear the scars Under all the stars Let it out on my guitar But have I gone too far It's too late now I already took my vow To stop the pain And all my shame The river is flowing But soon I will be growing With one more scar Under one more star They're just there as a reminder Of my pain And that I take with me Until the end of eternity ...eor |
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© Copyright 2002 matt cockrell - All Rights Reserved | |||
devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
We all carry that pain...would love to to find the magic trick to that. grins to us both huh? honest writing. enjoyed this and belated welcome you!!! Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
You should make your Constructive Critiques message a poem. |
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eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
thanks, it is in the working of a poem, but i just can't get it right yet...soon...hopefully...eor |
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Succubus Member
since 2002-09-30
Posts 82Canada, Ontario |
Great piece of work you have here. What struck me the most was this: "I already took my vow To stop the pain And all my shame" We seldom think about stoping the pain and shame when we're in bed crying. If we could only do that, there would be no tears to cry. I suppose it's like quitting cigarettes... you know it's gonna kill you mentally if you stop taking the poison, but if you do, you'll be alot healthier in the end... Kisses Succubus Better to have 10% of something than a 100% of nothing. |
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eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
so very, very true, if it was onlt that easy to do what we know we should...thanks...eor |
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Amaranthine Member
since 2002-10-06
Posts 61ON Canada |
I savored the sense of preordinance in this piece. It is as if you embrace your doom willingly; all you need is a cause, and you would be called a hero! |
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eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
thanks for your comment, but alas i am no hero...eor |
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