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Dark Poetry #3
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spit of sin
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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spit of sin |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali 
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The dark abyss in back of throat an albatross I’ll surely choke Spitting up the last of you Won’t fall again I’m sure. I’m through. Through with hurt and death stain grip Done with blending all you’ve stripped Contagious you inside my shine stinging, bitter pride resigned Clearer now no more turmoil stomach lining clean and boiled Rays of settle grip my skin pulling, pulling spit of sin. Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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| © Copyright 2002 Tanya Nicole Bustamante - All Rights Reserved | |||
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PoeticGoddessOfDepression Member
since 2002-07-02
Posts 439I am everywhere |
"Spitting up the last of you Won’t fall again I’m sure. I’m through." How many times have I said something like that? But unlike you, i give up easily... anyway, wonderful poem, Devina. Continue... -Sara "Your suffering will free you." |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
you amaze me I think I got some imagery down but, the smooth skinrhythm you got, I ain't got- an I'm green. can ya spare sum? please the me sighdee? BS I never aimed at reality; I aimed at truth. --Orson Welles |
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Purity Senior Member
since 2001-11-20
Posts 526Once Upon, USA |
I would venture that you being the albatross would rise above such contagion as this, and in your "Wont fall again, I'm sure...I'm through" are words of hope that I would pray you can mentor me into living and conveying in my own life. Again you prove yourself awesome, LADY!! (lol) |
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News_From_Nowhere Member
since 2002-06-14
Posts 173CU, NY |
This came across in a hidden dualism way as well... I had images based on your words choke, throat, spit..etc., that reminded me of a controlling requests adult theme I've been through. But yet that's a take less than implied by the poetic image here. You go, Devina! Amazing "So give life to your dreams, for there lies your survival, and cast your heart beyond those faded scenes, and I'll bring you through the storm |
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Moon Dust
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177Skelmersdale, UK |
wow i liked it If your afraid of the dark, then why did you come? |
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beccymelling Junior Member
since 2002-08-09
Posts 31Birmingham, England |
Wow Devina. What an amazing talent you have for imagery. I love the way you take emotional pain and relay it in a physical sense to heighten the readers awareness of what you are going through. "Contagious you" I love the idea of the person that has caused you so much pain being contagious - really struck a chord with me. "Rays of settle grip my skin pulling, pulling spit of sin." What can I say? absolutely fantastic!  |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
Sara- don't you go giving up...even if they start the name calling...why? because I can make somethen pretty out of every harsh word thrown...grins... *confidence lady* My siBri~ skinrhythm?? oohh...D likes it...(meet me in adult with words like that sir  ) And share you say? well...I'd have to see how good you look in my mini skirt n knee high army boots, then- we'll talk!! LOL You are too cute poet....thank you...Chris- you are the sweetest!!! I might be strong..but as they say, "sometimes- being a b**** is the only thing a woman has to hang on to"...as quoted ( I LIVE by it!! ) You have that strength gripping you and it will force it's way out...I just know.. NFN- (sorry, shortened you..lol) glad to provide some imagery today..that is a bonus to know...and here I was just cleansing a bit..thank you. Moon Dust- glad you enjoyed!!  Beccy- I always feel better knowing I can get someone to relate to the event through poetry...thanks lady!!! Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
this is venom devina . . . pure beauty just dusting the shelves in here . . . and found this before my eyes . . . |
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
Nice poem. I cant relate but I can appreciate. GIS a trickle of music from a well |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
And happy that the littlewing found it. I seem to have missed this the 1st time through. |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Ohhhhhhhh..this was really good! Susan |
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shytownboy Junior Member
since 2003-08-06
Posts 14Chicago |
I like what I am reading more and more with you. Keep it up. You have a very good gift for words. |
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SharaRose Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2501Somewhere out there~ |
WOW...good that it's over...ahem...this is strong. Making the break rips the soul. Hurts so bad you swear dying is alot better. It's good to get it out though. It's for sure that wouldn't be a good thing to keep inside. Hurt to read this one. Ouch! SharaRose @-->-- Of sound, and speech let all lift the hearer! |
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eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
honestly, i have no wrods for this, you left me breathless... "in a past life i was a woodcarver's knife: the sharpend blade of a wood cutter, the eldest son of the chief's brother: a maker of drums" |
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