Dark Poetry #3 |
Hypocrisy |
Stryder Junior Member
since 2002-06-22
Posts 29Silent Hill |
Hypocrisy Don’t pretend you have An emotional attachment to me; A high-strung affection for me. Beneath the surface- Underneath your skin; I know the hate you feel That’s buried within. I’ve done the math, And now everything Is so transparent to me. Why did it take so Long for me to see? You fabricated our love, And only now do I see; The plastic tears cascade- clearly down your cheek. Every emotion you’ve illustrated; Carefully performed to deceive me. And now, because of you I cry; I’ve exposed your hypocrisy. A couple of things to notice in the poem, is in the main title "cry" is bolded (and I use the word in my poem).The skeleton that the words in my poem make is the core of an apple. My illustration is that in this relationship someone slowly peeled away at me, and I didn't even notice it until it was to the core. To show what dishonesty can do in a relationship. -Stryder [This message has been edited by Stryder (06-28-2002 03:51 AM).] |
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© Copyright 2002 Stryder - All Rights Reserved | |||
deep_thought Junior Member
since 2002-06-28
Posts 24 |
The apple core makes an interesting parallel. Good stuff. This is good all the way. Trust me. "I know now why you cry, but it is something I can never do" |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
You've put yourself all into this one... "The plastic tears cascade- clearly down your cheek." don't we all know too well!! ~clever you... Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Clever in content, clever in construct. ~wranx "Writing is a perfectly natural thing to do....just remember to wash your hands afterward"....Heinlein. |
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Stryder Junior Member
since 2002-06-22
Posts 29Silent Hill |
Thank you all for you heart felt comments about my poem. I really did put some deep thought into the content, and construct of the poem (I'm glad it turned out okay)... -Stryder |
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