Dark Poetry #3 |
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You Haven't The Right |
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Krishankins![]()
since 2002-06-23
Posts 972Texas ![]() |
You call and talk of missing love Expecting me to care How could I when you broke MY heart With a love you never shared your 100grit love is smoothing my soul |
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© Copyright 2002 Kristopher Hankins - All Rights Reserved | |||
bsquirrel![]()
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Ouch. Your poems are always so haunting because of their sparse minimalism. I feel this one works great as a single bullet, but I wonder what it would be like if this one were expanded to tell more of the story? That is, if there is more to tell. Either way, great poem. These smiling eyes are just a mirror for the sun. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Right to the point. Enjoyed this. ![]() |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
Know this feeling well Kris... now's when you sing the "survivor" song to me!!! Mike is right..we are suckers here for dirty details...feel free to share!!! ![]() Take care sweets... ML ~D Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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Purity Senior Member
since 2001-11-20
Posts 526Once Upon, USA |
When they tell you you're smothering them, and "pushing", and leave for someone else, and then return to tell you of their sadness over loss of one that told them they were smothering and pushing....???? God has a strange way about him, and yet some never learn. I relate totally...Again, Kris, excellent poem! |
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Anvrill Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710in the interzone now |
I have SOOO been there..... Still getting over him, since I'm an idiot and don't seem to know the meaning of "letting go". *deep sigh* Awesome poem. "Sooner or later, they'll never grow up." -Jim Steinman (unreleased and almost completely unheard, but hey) |
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Tomer Senior Member
since 2002-06-28
Posts 1168Michigan |
Right to the point, nicely done. You might want to expand some more but if you feel you get your point across in a few lines, then it works ![]() Tomer |
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