Teen Poetry #4 |
![]() ![]() |
Broken Valenetine |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
jytree Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 336omaha ark usa |
Trouting through endless feilds, With a shelid of faith and a sword of courage in which I weild, Trotting through this endless miss, Looking upon this stars as I get my rest, Was I a good man when I die, Was I a honest man in which couldn't lie, Was I a gentleman in the eyes of few, Why was I this things yet, Why couldn't I say I love you, To feel the words one my lips, To feel them come to life with every new kiss, To feel them dance while you look into my eyes, To feel nothing as our loved died, For what was this curse that feel upon me, For all I wanted was just to be, Lying in the arm of that one to be, The one meant that is just for me, Until that day I will sit and fuss, As my heart returns from this muck, It didn't help to say goodbye, Just the same reaction, It's time to cry Lead me not into temptation, I can find the way there mysel |
||
© Copyright 2001 Michael Jay vaughn - All Rights Reserved | |||
Allan Riverwood![]() ![]()
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Beautiful! *applauds* I absolutely love the metaphors and description you used of your situation. Very lovely! Thanks for a great read, jytree. Keep up the excellent work. -Allan When the sun dies, and the earth is thrown off its axis, the two of us will still, at that moment, be thinking of one another. ~~Allan, to Amanda |
||
jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
nice work... out of FULL concern, type your poems in WORD and use spellcheck so that your message comes across more clear.. Im not trying to badger you, its just something to consider... very good peom bro, keep it up! Jeremy "Life is fading me away, far away, but I’m sketching myself back, line by line, mark by mark." - Jeremy Raulinaitis---'Fading Me Away' |
||
Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Good job on this, sometimes it wasn't clear to me, but I still like it. "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
||
Acies![]()
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
lovely sentiments very sad poem go ahead, it doesn't hurt to cry hope things do work out for you thanks for the read I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
||
Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Very nicely done here.....I liked this a lot jytree..... ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
||
Tears of Glass Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 182Physically? VA.... Mentally? I'm not quite sure |
This one is awesome.. Good job. *Jennifer "My nightmare isn't fearing what I dream... It's waking up, knowing what I'll see." |
||
Greeneyes617 Member
since 2000-11-22
Posts 329Arkansas |
Good job. [This message has been edited by Greeneyes617 (edited 02-17-2001).] |
||
Starr Member
since 2001-02-08
Posts 100 |
I like this poem.... sad ![]() ![]() |
||
Angel in Flight Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381 |
Very emotional poem almost brought me to tears. It reminded me of two very old sayings... It is better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all. And also. If you love someone let them go, and if they come back to you it was truly ment to be. I Am adding this to my library. Wonderful poem and keep posting. Life is like a storm, it passes you by without even knowing it~Amanda |
||
jytree Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 336omaha ark usa |
thanks angel that put a smile on my face to know my poem made it into your libary Lead me not into temptation, I can find the way there mysel |
||
![]() ![]() |
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |