Teen Poetry #4 |
Ice through your spine |
Isabel Galaxia Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733 |
I stare you down with my big glassy eyes Innocently I look at you All the while unblinking Ice runs down through your spine I allure you with my slightly asymmetrical figure Consequently visible from where you stand Your eyes drift towards me Ice runs down through your spine I entice you with my body language As you think I'm sexy And contemplating this Ice runs down through your spine I astound you with my rage As I shoot you and icy glare Ice runs down through your spine I alarm you with my audacity As I wear my jeans and tight shirt You stare quietly Ice runs down through your spine I surpass you with my eloquence As I have a bit of class and glow When I speak Ice runs through your spine You are midly attracted to me You'll shake it off I'm sure -I know this sounds like another one I wrote. This isn't meant to be in any way insulting towards me..that's a first..or maybe second. This isn't directed to my boyfriend, rather, to other guys, who shall remain nameless. As far as the sexy thing goes..who knows. Some guys claim this is true..then again..who knows. Bel [This message has been edited by Isabel Galaxia (edited 06-23-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Isabel Galaxia - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
I thought it was good |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
i liked it...great job on discribing it ...bye Bel im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you? |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Wonderful work, Bel. I really enjoyed this. Very interesting... nicely done. --Marie "Well the sun is slowly sinking down, but the moon is slowly rising. So this old world must still be spinning ‘round, and I still love you."–James T. |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Great work Isabel, I really enjoyed the read, keep up the good work Andrew |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
I like this one, it made me smile! Rhonda "Amy, can you PLEASE come to Spain with us so that we have someone to keep Rhonda calm?" - Mr. Ardeil *insert hysterical laughter from me here* |
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fozzyozzy Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336Lessburg Virginia |
Wow has this ever happened to me! have we met or something? Good job on this one by the way. "This is cactus land!!!"-T.S.Eliot |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I liked this one a lot. It really did built up as the poem went along. I got into it, but felt that the ending was a bit quick. It was at it's climax and never fell into a resolution. I thought it needed a bit more. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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