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Raven Skye
Member

since 2001-03-03

Posts 112
.In a House.

0 posted 2001-06-17 10:11 AM

Different then my usual style..but I like it..

Trapped,
Suffocating,
Lack of air,
Lack of love,
Imprisoned,
Fighting to be free,
To see the world,
Not these four walls,
Brick, Solid,
Running, Hitting,
Lashing out as frustration,
That I can not evaporate,
And diffuse through my prison bars,
You cannot keep my prisoner,
Just because I don’t love you,
It’s over, dead,
Yet why do I feel regret?
Sugar tears, Liquefy my fears,
That you have changed, your anger seems more prominent,
And this I am scared of,
And because of this, I have to go,
However strong my feelings to go back are,
I will not endanger myself,
You’re not going to walk over me,
Trapped no more,
Suffocating gone, Breathing freely,
Lack of air has vanished, I can breathe,
Lack of love will go, I’ll find someone who’ll love me,
I don’t need the pain,
The regret, The stress,
Of being loved by a moron,
Who thinks he knows best,
I’m going to get myself a better life,
Away from you.

Linc

Senior Member

since 2001-03-07

Posts 552
The Backstreet Boy

1 posted 2001-06-17 12:12 PM

Hey,

I haven't been around in a while so this is the first poem of yours I have read and I loved it. It is very good; superb even. Its going into my library, thanks for sharing

-- Linc

"Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment."

Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

2 posted 2001-06-17 12:13 PM

This was quiet good. I liked the format you used.

Regina

If you only understood my pain then maybe you could learn to be my friend. Be there. My crying shoulder. The smiles. And the caring i need to survive.

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

3 posted 2001-06-17 02:32 PM

This style you used was awesome. The beginning really caught my eye. THe flow was nice... and the format was great for the poem. Nice work, I enjoyed this quite a bit. I haven't really seen you around much, so I hope to see more from you.
Well done.

--Marie

"Imagine a pageant...
In my head the flesh seems thicker,
Sandpaper tears corrode the filth,
And I need you now somehow." --Silverchair

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

4 posted 2001-06-17 04:08 PM

Wow this was great. I really liked the line about being loved by a moron hehe.
Very well written

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

5 posted 2001-06-17 04:39 PM

Woah. Cool. Don't is suck being loved by a moron?

I like the format you used, it was really cool!
Rhonda

"Who did that?" "Charlie and Blake." "Who's Charlie and Blake?" "Rhonda and Amy.""Great. There goes the school."

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