»
Archives
»
Teen Poetry #4
»
blah to a title...I can't think of one!
| Teen Poetry #4 |
|
blah to a title...I can't think of one! |
|
|
anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
This was written really quickly..although the length would disagree. I was thinking whether or not to put this here, so the left side of my brain won and here it is. Enjoy people.  She walked along the edge, Walking on a imaginary line. Cleansing her soul of life itself, Filling a void that was so unsettled. Looking at the world beneath her, Lightening crashed and thunder roared. With each clash of might she shook, Hugging herself tighter than before. She walked through chains of glory, Shackled to an existence of emotions. The emotions of uninterested thoughts, Animations locked away in cages. Misunderstood, she descended, Her shadow a bleak memory of her survival. The experiences were better left untold, And the dreams better left undreamt. Under the lights of judgement, She never felt smaller. Robbed of breathing her own air, Forced to adjust to a barren land. Her blood ran through her hands, Covering the hands that fed the benefits of others. Defeated and dejected she swayed, In a breeze that was not unlike her mind. Slowly it was slipping through her fingers, The chance to seek something more. Her walls were being broken down, The defences weakened by torment. Confused with the rationalism of being human, The maintenance of her fear was out of order. Inside she was dying of rage, The flame that kept her going, quickly being extinguished. Empty, she sat gloomily, Staring at a painting seeing nothing more than black. Down the spiral of dark sensations, She yearned for her personal devil to reach out. Her pictorial of drunken wishes, Were being cast upon the world she no longer knew. The fog quickly took hold of her again, Leading the blind into a deadly obscurity. "Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." Buddha |
||
| © Copyright 2001 Elizabeth Johnson - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
WOW ... excellent description and wording AF! Powerful writing, and intense emotions described ... really well done! Best wishes, /Kit |
||
Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
wonderful naration of feelings and emotions it was a little long  But, I'm still glad I read this thanks for sharing I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
||
|
katherine Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Canberra Australia |
it's awesome! |
||
|
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Nice one here.......if katherine said it.....i gotta say it "it's awesome".....i'll add a "you go girl!" along with it too!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
||
|
sweetstuff101 Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 375OK, USA |
WOW....that was awesome!! I am SPEECHLESS (and believe me that doesn't happen for often!) Keep up the awesome work! Much Luv, ~*~S*W*E*E*T*S*T*U*F*F~*~ How come it is so easy for a person to say "I hate you," but it is so difficult for someone to say "I love you" and really mean it???? |
||
|
litle_krazy_poet Member
since 2001-01-17
Posts 71 |
wow i love you stuff and to tell you the truth i look for you stuff everytime i come in here and i love wording somethings need poems and then there are thoes that are just for fun |
||
|
anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Greetings people. Kit: Well the mood that I was in when I wrote it was a VERY intense. You know the one where people back away from you because your eyes change colour etc? Well it was one of those. Acire: Long huh?? *L* yeah I know, couldn't help it though. All these lines just kept popping up in my head and I had to get them all down. Damn stupid mind...*L* Katherine: Thank you. Dopey: Boo yeah! *does a funky dance* I got a "you go girl!" *L* Thanks for that. SweetStuff: OK I am not sure if leaving you speechless is a good thing but if you enjoyed what I wrote I am glad that I was of assistance to you. LKP: Thanks for the comment. I'm happy that my work has made you seek me out. ~AF~ "Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." Buddha |
||
|
Poet on Acid Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 325Florida, USA |
ouch, that is some deep stuff. As always you have written a marvelous poem. I always enjoy reading your work. Keep it up. >¶Øʆ< |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
