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Teen Poetry #4
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chasing rain
Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737
Canada

0 posted 2001-06-05 11:12 PM


Not my best...blame exams.  

==========
This force that pulls me down
Is the only thing that holds me
To the ground.
Afraid I'll walk above
The silver clouds
And enter heaven.
It draws me near
It pulls me away
Which way do I go?
I'm in between
I'm trapped inside
I obstruct the flow.

This force in me
Is what you see
This is real
This is me.

Concrete silence
It breaks the window
Of the past.
Afraid of change
Afraid of love
Afraid of
Going fast.

Gravity surrounds me
There's nothing else
That I can be.

I heard a funny quote once...*scratches head*

© Copyright 2001 chasing rain - All Rights Reserved
SEA
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Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
1 posted 2001-06-05 11:14 PM


go slow...don't be afraid to slow things down........great write   SEA
Dopey Dope
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Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2001-06-05 11:35 PM


Susan knows her stuff....well most of the time. So follow her advice.
Well done here!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

anonymous albert ?
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-06-05 11:55 PM


i dunno this poem gave me some major pressure ...hehe...but yea...this was a nice one...i liked it and hope to see more...and exams suck!...only if you go? ...hehe...bye leah

i'm addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Dr. Jo-Bizz
Member
since 2001-06-06
Posts 97

4 posted 2001-06-06 01:42 AM


yeah.  exams.  the eternal scape goat.  good poem.  I guess I must go for the short choppy verses.  I dunno why.  I liked it though.  

dr. jo-bizz

But His word was in my heart
like a burning fire
Shut up in my bones;
I was weary of holding back,
And I could not.

xShUgArHiGhx
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Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
5 posted 2001-06-06 07:53 AM


Wow sounds like a huge battle...hope you get through this fine. I really liked the poem...keep on postin!  
the_rescue
Member
since 2001-05-23
Posts 316
Japan
6 posted 2001-06-06 09:03 AM


that was a good poem I actually liked it a lot something I have never been able to do with my poetry is do the short verses, I totally respect and appreciate those that can
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