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Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

0 posted 2001-06-04 06:05 PM

Double End:

Smile Smile every day.
Love will conquer all, I say!
Love so true and pure with heart.
Love as sweet as a tart.

Frown Frown every night.
Hate will conquer all in sight!
Hate so true and bold in form.
Hate in dark has been born.

Smile Smile here right now.
There's love in you somewhere, somehow!
I see your care rise within.
To defy love is the one great sin.

Frown Frown till tomorrow.
Hate is accompanied by sorrow.
I see your hole grow farther deep.
The hate in you, you cannot keep.

Bitter Bitter ways thrive strong.
Love Love not for long.
Hate Hate we seldom see.
This simply is the end of thee.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2001-06-04 06:07 PM

Dopey

this is very good my sweetie pie....like this much

LCsftball16
Junior Member

since 2001-05-17

Posts 39

2 posted 2001-06-04 06:33 PM

i really thought this poem was cute!

little_krazy_poet
Junior Member

since 2001-05-28

Posts 41

3 posted 2001-06-04 06:36 PM

i like it a lot. at saw at the end of the poem that the emothions seemed to destroy the person inside or it's just a poem about emotions. well anyway i really like it

WRITE WHAT YOU FEEL!! AND DON’T LET ANYONE TELL YOU TO DO OTHERWISE

chasing rain
Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 737
Canada

4 posted 2001-06-04 06:54 PM

I liked your double-endedness *gives herself weird look* Okaaaay, leah...
Anyway,
Yeah! i liked the poem, and i liked how it wrapped up at the end. But sometimes the metre went off the road a bit.
I've seen better from you, but good work anyways! Keep postin' jav!

-Leah

"If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that i was made for another world."
-C.S.Lewis

Shygirl82
Member

since 2001-02-19

Posts 245
Ilinois

5 posted 2001-06-04 07:40 PM

I really liked this one...good emotions
my favorite part:
"Smile Smile here right now.
There's love in you somewhere, somehow!
I see your care rise within.
To defy love is the one great sin."

I thought that part was pretty cool..
Excellent job as usual..
Always,
~Nikki~

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

6 posted 2001-06-04 08:13 PM

As usual - creative, meaningful, enjoyable, and true. Good job with this one, Javier.

"...if you want love you must be love.."
Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins

Deranger
Member

since 2000-05-10

Posts 498
Somewhere, between here and there

7 posted 2001-06-04 08:48 PM

Well, if you really want to know what i think...

I think meter should be used sparingly, much like the fats and oils group of the food pyramid. But for some reason, it might be ok for this peice. I see you switching between love and hate, but i'm not seeing the double end...was that just a clever title, or am i missing something? Anyway, it was a little cute for my taste, but i think it's a good poem.

Spreading insanity, one post at a time

My skull has glowing green eyes!

fozzyozzy
Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 336
Lessburg Virginia

8 posted 2001-06-04 10:50 PM

"Double your pleasure
Double your fun
With double mint gum"

Thats not really related but oh well.(i'm goofy t'night) Kidding aside.Marvelous poem you have posted. You are a king mr.moderator. King Dope I like the sound of it

fooseballozzy

"The heart can think of no devotion
Greater than being shore to ocean
Holding the curve of one position
Counting an endless repetition"
Robert Fr

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

9 posted 2001-06-04 11:04 PM

I liked this one alot Javier.
And I don't need it explained. ( Thats a first aye?)
The title though....needs some work....I am thinking...Something that starts with a "J" perhaps???? I dunno....

hehe
Seriously though- I liked this one.

LoneWolf
Member

since 2001-03-10

Posts 384
IL

10 posted 2001-06-04 11:11 PM

wow i really liked this one a lot. good job.

It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that.
I've learned that even when you th

Spine Grinder
Senior Member

since 2000-10-28

Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...

11 posted 2001-06-05 01:53 PM

LOVELY javi really lovely, i loved this to pieces!
~

fall hard, practice harder not to fall

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

12 posted 2001-06-05 04:22 PM

very different from what i've seen from you javi...maybe thats why i loved it even more.,..very nice words arranged...the flow was nice also...and the way youe xpressed it throughout...awesome!

...bye javi

i'm addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

[This message has been edited by anonymous albert ? (edited 06-06-2001).]

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

13 posted 2001-06-05 04:33 PM

Great work Dopey I enjoyed reading this immensely... Zu

HeAvEnS AnGeL
Member

since 2001-05-17

Posts 168
The Hot Girl From Canada

14 posted 2001-06-05 11:48 PM

This was an awesome poem! Keep smiling hun

Don't judge a person untill you have walked a mile in their shoes, this way your a mile away from them, and you have their shoes.
Whatever tomorrow b

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

15 posted 2001-06-06 01:14 AM

Leah and Deranger, you are both right. I have written better, but I do like to post bad poems by me so people can see how horrible I can write at times.

I agree with the meter deranger, and I guess it's a "cute" poem but it's not really meant to be like that.

The title....Double Ends....it's basically talking about the double ends of hate and love.....opposite sides....double ends....1 end....2 end.....= double end? ok haha i guess.
ANyway Thanks to all who have replied, but this poem is horrible in my opinion, but hey thanks for liking it.

I shall post some more in the future

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

16 posted 2001-06-06 02:21 AM

wow...theres nuthing i can say about this that everyone hasnt said already about this poem..so ditto to everyone dopes..

...keep posting more and more and more !!!...MORE says i!!!!....i know youve got great stuff hidden away ...so bring em out now!

....very very very well done javvie...i enjoyed reading this HEAPS!!!!!youre a wonderful poet...keep doing what youre doing cuz it makes *me* happy..

"Life is not long and boring,
it's short and compelling." -Javier Agosto-

Dr. Jo-Bizz
Member

since 2001-06-06

Posts 97

17 posted 2001-06-06 02:29 AM

yah, I deffinately see the "double-ended" nature of it. has anyone read Alice in Wonderland/Through the Looking glass by Lewis Carroll?

dr. jo-bizz

But His word was in my heart
like a burning fire
Shut up in my bones;
I was weary of holding back,
And I could not.

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

18 posted 2001-06-06 07:52 AM

Ooooo i liked this one!!! Good job dopey old boy

the_rescue
Member

since 2001-05-23

Posts 316
Japan

19 posted 2001-06-06 09:08 AM

nice write there dopey I liked the repetitious first lines it was really good

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