Teen Poetry #4 |
Up into This, a Starry Night |
fozzyozzy Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336Lessburg Virginia |
Up into This, a Starry Night First, a twinkling apparatus To set the scene perfect for us Fall into the stars you can trust Here on earth I can see nothing except rust Meander among twilight and come upon the dawn Mind and skin supple like a fawn Ready for knowledge to be withdrawn Round and round our circle your song You scare easily, what are the stars so wrong Never save the truth never to tell me of the stars You say sparkling omniscence can be found here When I wonder where you are among the stars Just a comet a shooting star to be gone a blink Just gone Guess it was too real for you Too deep too true For the likes of you Stare into open oceans of floating stars (floating endlessly don't they sean) If they were a sea, we woulda drowned amongst stars (What if they were gone) We would go blind searching for the stars (This feels so wrong) Breath the stars --------------------------- This aing(is not) the best I've done. oh well. Slam it if you must "The heart can think of no devotion |
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© Copyright 2001 Sean Michael DeFlora - All Rights Reserved | |||
xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Wow this was beautifully written...very nice Keep the poems comin! |
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Meggie1986 Junior Member
since 2001-05-22
Posts 41California |
No matter what you say, I think this one is really great. I love the break that the third stanza makes, it seems a little different than the rest; fitting for what it is saying. I love the last stanza. It really seems to sum up the poem. Beautiful work! *One meets his destiny often in the road he takes to avoid it. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well done here. I enjoyed this a lot. I love your style a lot. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
yes, very well done!! |
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