Teen Poetry #4 |
Once Upon A Time |
LoneWolf Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 384IL |
"Once Upon A Time" Once upon a time We walked hand in hand Smiling as we moved forward through this desolate land Once upon a time My heart felt true joy As i felt your warm embrace The darkness seemed to slip away Once upon a time Dreaming brought delite For I could feel your love Within my dreams each night Once upon a time Is all that can be said For now broken and cast aside I remain here to remember days gone by And dream the dreams I had Once upon a time It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that. I've learned that even when you th [This message has been edited by LoneWolf (edited 05-31-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Colin Heffernan - All Rights Reserved | |||
knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
i liked how u started each stanza the same way and the overall flow to this, along with the message with it. the last stanza i loved tho! i think you did a great job on this! keep up the good work. *hugs* tiff “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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the_rescue Member
since 2001-05-23
Posts 316Japan |
I like it it's really well written and the feelings are expressed well. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Pretty nostalgic (sp).....well done! I really enjoyed this one. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
as always...this was well written ...i enjoyed it...bye i'm addicted to passions in poetry!...are you? |
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
beautiful poem...once upon a time...*sigh*....i enjoyed it alot..thanks very much for the read...keep posting
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
this is really cute. I like it.keep writing!! Stace I'm just glad that now this rainstorm has ended, and I can see the rainbow once again. |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
yeah...had my once upon a time...it was a nightmare though....now I have my happily ever after (that is MUCH better) |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
oyyy do i dare even wanna think about all my "once upon a times??" lets not go there shall we?? lol...loved the poem...wonderfully written! |
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Suga_Baby Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380Maine, USA |
I can relate... can't we all!! nice work Suga "A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep." |
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DarkAngelOfTheStars Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 255 |
loved it Dont knock on deaths door ...... ring the bell and run......he hates that |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
I liked this one ALOT. Great poem, very nicely written. Something I and MANY others can relate to. |
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LoneWolf Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 384IL |
Thank you all for the replies. It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that. |
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