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fearing-laughter
Senior Member

since 2001-04-24

Posts 605
land of cheese (Wisconsin)

0 posted 2001-05-25 01:12 AM

dunno about this one...it's sorta a love poem but sorta not. oh well tell me what ya think. thanks lots. -fear-

i once was one but now i'm two.
ever since the day i met you.
i saw your laugh.
i heard your smile.
falling in love with you all the while.
before you i was so scared, so alone.
but your love made me feel as though i had a home.
home was in your arms, feeling your touch.
but then you were gone, leaving only my poor heart crushed.
with the world so full of hate and crime.
how do i cope without you by my side?
how do i deal with the everyday things...
like the pain that my life now brings.

-fear-

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

1 posted 2001-05-25 02:04 AM

i enjoyed this poem quite a bit...the situation is sad...hope things are better

...keep writing...

...?

if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry"

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

2 posted 2001-05-25 04:08 AM

Well done here. I enjoyed this poem.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

punkrockerrobin

Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 1180
Sparks, NV

3 posted 2001-05-25 04:13 AM

wonderful!

keep it up!
robin

I AM WHAT I AM SO DEAL!

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

4 posted 2001-05-25 12:00 PM

this was a great poem....i really enjoyed reading it..

...well done!

"Life is not long and boring,
it's short and compelling." -Javier Agosto-

the_rescue
Member

since 2001-05-23

Posts 316
Japan

5 posted 2001-05-25 01:13 PM

I think it was good kinda liked the lines I saw your laugh and heard your smile intresting

knightlyshadows
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 791
obscured vision

6 posted 2001-05-25 02:02 PM

i liked this alot. i can relate to it very well.
i loved the lines:
"i saw your laugh.
i heard your smile."

i think you did a great job on this.
tiff

“A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.”

Just leave me alone and give me some space.

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

7 posted 2001-05-25 02:48 PM

I echo the rest. Great job, very interesting read.

Jenn

"If it's wrong to love you, then my heart just won't let me be right, cause I'm drowned in you, and I won't pull through without you by my side." Mari

Poet on Acid
Member

since 2001-01-07

Posts 325
Florida, USA

8 posted 2001-05-30 03:59 AM

Damn, could you get much more depressing? Oh...wait, damn I forgot who I was for a minute. Great work.

"It's too cold in the world...too cold to be alone..." - >¶ØÊ†<

stace_co2003
Member

since 2001-03-30

Posts 497
In a dream world

9 posted 2001-05-30 09:11 PM

I really like this piece, and I do hope things do get better for you. if you ever need anyone to talk to, mail me!! [email protected]

Stace

I'm just glad that now this rainstorm has ended, and I can see the rainbow once again.

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