Teen Poetry #4 |
Your Many different faces |
Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Ok i'm stuck in a prolonged period of writers block but I decided to write something... this is the only piece out of many that I liked... and it's infuriatingly pants... anyway tell me what you think and try and inspire me... please Your many different faces. Fiction in your eyes, Fact amongst your lies, You love in your disguise, And so you lie. Living in your game, Cannot bare the fame, Hiding all your shame, And so you lie. Head amongst the cloud, Skimming across the crowd, I guess you are too proud, And so you lie. You just laugh at me, Condemn what you see, Something you can’t be, And so you lie. Sparkle in your eye, Lift yourself so high, Reach out for the sky, but it’s a lie. <<<_Mr mr Zu_>>> " The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots" -Thomas jefferson |
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© Copyright 2001 Andrew Sewell - All Rights Reserved | |||
Pixie-Babe03 Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387Central Maine |
this poem is wonderful! its full of emotion and someth8ing that is easily related to for many of us i am sure! -=Justine=- -=Love starts with a SMILE, grows with a KISS, and ends with a TEAR=- |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
such real words...i enjoyed this poem greatly...thanks for the sharing of this poem...and keep writing... ...? if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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obscurity of cloud Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 294....:::::******:::::.... |
I loved the contrasting phrases in this. Startling. Keep posting! "so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
AhhhhHHhHhhhhhhhh I loved this one!!!! Great jobers Mr. Marshalzu |
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lonely*soul Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396east haddam (moodus) ct :) |
if thats writers block..then i dunno what u call what i have hehe...that was great!! *KiMMiE* |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
VERY VERY VERY well done! You amazed me with this one. I really liked it! I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
it's infuriatingly pants???....hahhaha..whatever that meant...i have to disagree with it! this was great...i love the twist at the end....another great poem by you mr mr zu... |
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Sabriel.s.h.lover Member
since 2001-04-16
Posts 73b.f.e. aka- Hickville |
Loved it!two thumbs way way up! this is goin in my library! sabriel~ So many books, so little time |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
This is a wonderful piece! I love how the repetition and the contrast all work together to get the point acros... and such a point! Great work, thanks for sharing. "Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli |
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
Marsha, heehee, sorry, I had to do it. but I don't konw why you call that writers block..that's really good. and I can actually relate to it. oops, gotta go, talk to you later! *s* Stace |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Ok so you guy's all like it... that's weird... because I am so not sure about this... Anyway thank you to everyone who replied Zu " The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots" -Thomas jefferson |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Your poems have impressed me lately. Iis it me, or are you getting much better? Keep it up my friend. Keep sharing "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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