Teen Poetry #4 |
love and poetry |
Godsend_1 Member
since 2001-04-19
Posts 247great state of illinois |
living a new life, making the best. trying a new way, living in love and poetry. watching the pains, drifting away. taking my time, living in love and poetry. wondering why, life isn't the greatest for you. making you see life while, living of love and poetry. why you dwell, on the darker side. life isn't all bad, living in love and poetry. do you dream, of greater things. of a life more perfect, living in love and poetry. do you live in a life, of love and poetry? i am what i am and that is all that i am and all that i shall ever be......so deal with it |
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© Copyright 2001 Ben Redshaw - All Rights Reserved | |||
AngelPoet87 Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 280Indy |
Ooo, deep one Ben. And I see you used punctuation *laughs*, well I'm loving the last lines, really brilliant. You've gotta lotta passion. Keep up the writing hun and take care always. Ali |
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knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
ben i like this one! yea i was suprised by the punctuation just likes ali toos lols newayz i like this hun. cant wait for mores! i love you *hugs* tiff “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
this was very good and i enjoyed how you said it but the repition got a little tiring maybe putt more between or put it every otehr line...or somewhat...other then that the maning behind was nice....keep writing... ...? if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
i actually really liked the repitition in this, i think that this is really beautifully written. definetely one of my favorites by you, great job on this. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I do.....i live in life and poetry....hura! I liked the poem! I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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5_sweet_kisses Junior Member
since 2001-04-20
Posts 49 |
Coolioz Ben, very good poem. I can't be on long. Just checking mail, but I can drop in here and give you a few lines. You keep up the good work. *huggles* Peeker |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
I guess your name is Ben I like the read but I felt your words lacked a little more emotion in them. But that's only my opinion. Thanks for the read and keep sharing "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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