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Teen Poetry #4
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When It All Comes Down
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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When It All Comes Down |
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MoeRocko Member
since 2001-04-25
Posts 166West Virginia |
Where will you be when it all comes down Will you be able to stay afloat, or just lay down and drown? Will you still be around, or lose the strength you thought you found? When It all comes down Will you be safe and sound? or will your little world tumble to the ground? Can you really prove, you won't be sold or do you think they'll fall for your Fool's Gold When it all comes down, you can trust I'll still be around With my friendship, you'll still be crowned I won't betray When it all comes down..... Don't turn your back on the future, you have nothing to look back on..... |
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| © Copyright 2001 Ewok Enterprise - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
this is very sweet  |
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chas Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 101Lynn, ma |
nice poem, so is there going to be a second part to this cus i want to know what and when it all comes down? |
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knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
awwwww this is great ewoksters! *hugs* loves ya muchs best friend best friend  lolstiff  “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
I like how it trailed off... really good job Ewok. Hope to see you around more. ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
this was weet and a enjoyable read..thanks for sharing and keep writing...  ...?if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
the use of the elipse at the end made this really interesting, almost telling the reader to contemplate the ending themselves. i like this, thanks for the read. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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Allysa
since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952In an upside-down garden |
this is really good. Can't wait to read more, if there is some. I wish people would stop telling me that I can do anything I want to. I never thought that I couldn't. |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Wow welll you asked some very good questions in this poem...very nice...very nice... |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
Very nice! This is the first of your poems that I have read. Keep posting! *~*Amanda*~* |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Good job on the poem, I think it's the first one I've read by you. So hi I like your critique message "Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle" Plato. |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
"I won't betray when it all comes down" You have shown a good attitude on this poem. Wonderful write and keep sharing. Thanks for the beautiful read. "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I REALLY enjoyed this one. Very very very well written. I liked it.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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