Teen Poetry #4 |
My wishes |
Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
I wish to kiss Your luscious lips, I wish to hold you in my arm, Love you till the end of dawn, I wish to tell you things Seeing you the joy it brings, I wish to see that smile, Only for an eternal while, I love the way you blush, Setting my beat to a rush, I wish to hold you in my heart, Not only when we are apart. Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) |
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© Copyright 2001 Ronil B Tataria - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
very sweet SEA |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
i'm glad you are posting here... cuz i really enjoyed this read.. i thought it was a great poem.. tahnks for sharing and keep writing ...? if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
Such simple wishes. I hope that they eventually come true 4 u..Good work. ~*Nikki*~ ~*Of all the millions of people in the world, I'm just me.*~ |
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lonely*soul Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396east haddam (moodus) ct :) |
wishing for someone to love...dont alotta ppl wish that..i know i do lol..nice job on this one. keep posting *KiMMiE* |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Very nice poem... couplets are a good way to do a simple rhyme. You did nicely. ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
I am overwhlemed by your responses my friend. I shall post here most often. Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
i hope you do post here more often, i really enjoyed reading this piece by you. the use of couplets is one of my favorite techniques and you did an excellent job with this style. i look forward to reading more of your work. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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ScarletPoetess Junior Member
since 2001-05-09
Posts 18 |
I really like the couplets. They make the flow excellent, and make the piece more powerful. I liked this! Scarlet |
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Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
more love and romantic poems will be coming your way my friends. Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
This is so romantic...ahhhh beautiful |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Such a sweet poem "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
Thanks for your response acire. Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I liked it, but I know i've seen better from you. You usually post in dark, i think....either that or corner, but i think it's dark. Anyway....it was ok. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
well dopey, you are right, but i thought i would try out the love part once in a while. Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) |
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Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
well dopey, you are right, but i thought i would try out the love part once in a while. Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) |
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