»
Archives
»
Teen Poetry #4
»
Shyness
| Teen Poetry #4 |
|
Shyness |
|
|
Crucifix New Member
since 2001-05-07
Posts 4 |
When i gaze at your eyes...my soul leaps up in surprise...yet when i gaze at you...i stumble and fall and seem the fool...i hold in mine heart a love so pure...yet in mine bashfullness my strenght is poor...once strong and so firm...tis quivering now and my heart doth squirm...will my life be like this...never to know thy touch or know true bliss? |
||
| © Copyright 2001 Crucifix - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
AngelShell Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 446not heaven nor hell so... |
Hey this was awesome. I reall liked the way you set it out, totally different and it really added to the feel of the poem. Great job. |
||
|
banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
The old english style that you used made this a really interesting read. great job on this, keep posting all your work. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
||
Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
I really enjoyed this quite a bit. Shell pointed out that it's in a different style than usual, personally I didn't like how it was like that. However that's just my opinion.  Hope to see you around here more often. ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
||
|
lonely*soul Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396east haddam (moodus) ct :) |
well as much as your opinion counts around here..i like the form like this...hopefully this post will bounce ya to the 1st. pg! awsome job *KiMMiE* |
||
|
Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Oh I liked this a lot. Grreat job. ~Carly "Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the self-same well from which your laughter rises was often-times filled with your tears." ~Kahil Gibran |
||
|
anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
great job on the poem... i enjoyed this quite a bit and on teh format do whatever you prefer its your style...keep writing   ...?if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
||
|
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
It will unless you go out there and get what you want. Don't be shy.....i liked the poem though, you write very well.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
||
|
Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
oh my....this is an excellent poem you've just impressed me I see you're even useing Shakespearean english such as "doth" excellent "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
