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Teen Poetry #4
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Take me back
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Take me back |
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Kevin
since 1999-11-02
Posts 729Torrington, Ct, Usa 
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I posted this in open and ill probably get yelled at : / but it just gets lost in all those old people =D so I wanted to post it here...SORRY! Why is it that my blindness Is so clearly seen when looking back? Why is it that my kindness Only leaves me open to attack? Why is it that my heart Just ends up getting in the way? Why is it that we part In silence with so much to say? Why is it that we hold Onto our pride with all our might? Why do our lives unfold As we miss chances to make right? Why did we meet at this young age Instead of when were older? Why do I cry upon this page Instead of on your shoulder? Why do you hold my everything, The life that I now lack? Why wont you take this love I bring? Why wont you take me back? |
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| © Copyright 2001 Kevin Bednarz - All Rights Reserved | |||
branden726
since 2000-09-25
Posts 607Bay City, MI |
Hey..Well i really think this is a well said,written terrific poem and i liked it a lot. keep posting  *Tears of love* |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
This was quite sad... but had some very clever phrases in it. I especially like... "Why do I cry upon this page Instead of on your shoulder?" Very nicely done, and good to see you back. ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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Suga_Baby Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380Maine, USA |
YAY! I love this so very very much! WONDERFUL job..."A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep." |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
great poem... i really liked the whole poem overalll enjoyed the read.. keep writing   ...?if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Kevin, it's great as always, keep posting them for us "Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle" Plato. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
This was wonderful kevin!!! I really enjoyed this one a lot. Well done.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
it's my opinion that poems with repetition schemes are difficult to write but i feel that you have written this one well... like allan, i liked those particular lines |
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Jenn Cirrincione
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107Fl |
This was good, but terribly sad. Sometimes life's not fair, and makes no sense!! "I've come too close to happiness, to have it swept away,don't think I can take the pain, never fall again..." Janet |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
i really liked the rhymes in this, i thought it was very well written and the emotion is great. i hope to read lots more from you in the future. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
A really sad story. Hope things do get better for you. Thanks for sharing "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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