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Ski*Chick
Member

since 2001-01-13

Posts 141
Fitchburg, Mass, Usa

0 posted 2001-04-28 02:57 PM

Shining

A light comes threw the window, and I see your face smiling down

I look and notice that it’s going to be a good day for me, even though I miss you

I’ll be graduating soon you’ll see me saying bye to my friends but I’ll be fine

I’ve learned so many things how to live without you

A movie impacts me a person impacts on my life

People tell me not to send them sad poems but that’s how I feel about life

My life is full of challenges and a bumpy road ahead of me

I see the road getting bumpy but then smooth some parts

But that’s how everybody’s life is smooth then bumpy

I’m different but that’s okay and I love adventure dad

Just like you some people tell me I remind them of you

Cause of your courage strength that makes me proud

I’m not afraid to take different challenges

If I come across one that is too hard I do not give up because,

I know I can do that challenge

When I’m on the track I can feel you cheering me on

Go faster come on you can do it!

When the time comes to the meet I’ll win for you and myself

There’s never a day that I don’t think of you

Your in my heart you have a special place in it

When I’m sad your face appears in sunlight

Minna

April 27, 2001

It's hard seeing someone loving your ex, when it's your ex friend who's loving him.

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

1 posted 2001-04-28 03:03 PM

This is very sweet, Minna!

I really enjoyed it. The last line was a wonderful statement.
A critique would be to look at ways to reword a few sentences that have grammar errors... for example, "I can do that challenge" would be "I can complete that challenge?" Just a friendly piece of advice.

Another marvelous, heart-wrenching poem. I must say that I see why some people don't like to read these, they really are quite emotional and hit home.
I admire your skill in expressing emotion.

~Allan

Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
~Unknown

Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

2 posted 2001-04-28 05:03 PM

Ill just leave it to allan to say what i want to say. This was amazing.

Regina

"Take a look at my face, there's no price I won't pay
To say these words to you"bon jovi

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-04-28 06:17 PM

great poem...
this poem itself..
was a emotionally amazin'
i really liked the way..
u expressed urself in this poem
very good job
and keep writing

...?

death is not the greatest loss in life. the greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live. -norman cousins

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

4 posted 2001-04-29 05:18 PM

I enjoyed this Minna....i hope your life gets happy soon!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

5 posted 2001-05-21 01:31 PM

~*standing ovation*~
.
.
.
I loved it

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

vixengrl04
Member

since 2001-04-26

Posts 495
East Haddam, CT

6 posted 2001-05-21 05:01 PM

This was really cute, I liked this piece alot you really did a great job on it.. I love the way its like were reading through your thoughts.

~*Nikki*~

~*Of all the millions of people in the world, I'm just me.*~

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