Teen Poetry #4 |
hurt |
boarderfreak9 New Member
since 2001-04-20
Posts 3 |
i breathed you , and loved everything about you.you were everything to me.you seemed to catch on , play along and soon we were the best off friends. we crossed that line and thought nothing off it. then .. you told me it was a joke. the hurt you caused felt worse than a ton of bircks falling on me. the pain and suffering was enough to make me cry but i held it in thinking that you were just joking. i learned you werent and it hurt even more. you tryed to patch things up , but the damage was done , no need for friend ship . no need for trust . i wouldnt matter anyways cuz you didnt care. that was a long time ago and its over now me havin found someone better than you. i cared so much bout you and you hurt me like this. at a point i thoguht you liked me . how foolish of me. i dont care any more i never will. i could live if you were dead. i still wouldnt care. you have that affect on poeple to srcew up thing and you did alot more here than just hurt.you write stupid emails that say that "im sorry how i treated you in the past and i hope youll for give me" well im sorry now but i just dont care. remember the candles. how could you for get ? deep moments like those seem to have no meaning now all because they hurt. |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
isn't this prose..? LOL i think this is only "poetry" anyways i thought u had some thoughts in here and this might get locked if not thats koo so either way keep writing ...? |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Looks like prose to me....we'll see. Anyway, nicely done here. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
If this is prose, there's a forum in the main forums page called "Passions in Prose" and I'm sure you would get more responses to this if it's posted there. I did enjoy this, it's very well written, but if it is prose, then you might want to think about posting it in the prose forum. Nice job, though. --Marie subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart. |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
I think this should be checked, it did look like prose to me as well. (writing in paragraph form, short stories for example.) It was fine to read though, not bad at all. ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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