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Teen Poetry #4
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Poet on Acid's Experimental Writing Form
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Poet on Acid's Experimental Writing Form |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg 
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(okay, okay. I did this awhile ago, after Poet introduced that writing form for us, the one-word-at-a-time style of poem. Intrigued me. Here's mine.) Breathe Climb Scrape Bleed Climb Stop Look Breathe Jump Smile Soar Look Fall Scream Fall Land Bleed Breathe (that's it, fellows, my first shot at it. it is far more difficult than it looks, you should all give it a shot.) |
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| © Copyright 2001 Brian James Lee - All Rights Reserved | |||
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DragonFang Senior Member
since 2000-03-09
Posts 522Missouri, USA |
Hmmm.. y'know, this form seems to grow on ya... I think I will give it a shot when mood becomes a bit less bleak. Nice one BTW allan "Sa souvraya niende missian ye." \ I am lost in my own mind. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I thought you did the style very well. I think the style in itself is extremely creative. To capture a mood or exhibit a message within a poem like this can be complicated.........but.......I think it's too easy. I wouldn't write like this even though I like it. The style is great, it's just not for me. Allan, I think you write very well in this style. Keep it up.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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sweetypie5 Member
since 2000-10-06
Posts 97MWC,OK,USA |
I'm not very familiar with this kind of poetry but it was good...maybe I will try it sometime. Keep writing! *~*Hope is a walking dream*~* *~*Don't take life too seriosly~~~you'll never get out alive*~* |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
Allan, hey there. well It was very good. It reminds me of e.e. cummings, and andother poet i just dont remeber the name. the style was flowing and so were the emotions. Regina |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Ah, wonderful use of the form allan, I really like the poem. "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
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Salooma Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781 |
this was really good use of that form. i've never used it before, but it must be hard to create a meanigful piece with just few words. great job! salma |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
simpy amazing one worded stanzas which when together makes a lot of sense amazing I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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The Lost Supertone Member
since 2001-01-20
Posts 74Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada |
Sorry, but honestly... it MOVED ME!!! not really... OK I guess the form could be used well and could mean something... but... I think that this just... well... ack unless the tittle is very descriptive then I think that the poem loses it's effect. Like ok you say like Fighting a loseing battle Swing slash crash fall cut bleed and so on. You kind of at least know what it's about. I mean granted mine sucks, it was just put togeather in like 3 seconds. course I may have jus tmissed the tittle and simply seem like an ignornt Jack ass who people are soon gona start chucking banana's at because he's not always complementing other people... but oh well... if people get mad at me I can just appoligse and retreat to another part of the web. |
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Poet on Acid Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 325Florida, USA |
wow, must say I'm glad I'm not the only one venturing into unknown territory. I believe that was better than either one of mine. Keep it up man. >¶Øʆ< |
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The Lost Supertone Member
since 2001-01-20
Posts 74Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada |
ooo the fabled poet on acid! WOW can I have your autograph? Kidding... but I would like to get your opinion on my one written in a similar form called "Swords of Decit" |
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