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Teen Poetry #4
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dreams
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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dreams |
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chas Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 101Lynn, ma |
DREAMS The chance for me to be happy, is as slim as it can be, I am locked inside a cell, unable to get free, My world is full of disappointments, my emotion full of pain, The torments I have been through, would make a mortal man insane, Every night I call for help, but no one is around to hear, My mind can hardly think, it's clouded with too much fear, Is there anybody out there, is there any one who cares, I have been here way to long, I have been here 18 years, Every day that I sleep, every night when I'm awake, I plan for my moment, my moment to escape, By now you should've known, that I wouldn’t be free until I die, But I dream a dream so pretty, and that what's keeping me ALIVE. |
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| © Copyright 2001 chas - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
LOVELY!!!! i loved this poem. It was awesome. Great main idea. *S*staci |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
"Every night I call for help, but no one is around to hear, My mind can hardly think, it's clouded with too much fear," This is a beautiful poem! You did a marvelous job. I really think you portrayed a lot here, and it made me have to sit back and think. Nice job! --Marie subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart. |
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LoneWolf Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 384IL |
hey, i really really liked this poem. i know exactly what your talking about here. every daya and night the same thoughts accure to me. i don't think you missed a single thing with this. well i really enjoyed reading this one. great job on the poem. It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that. |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
outstanding poem!! i really related 2 this one.great job. i really liked it.  |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Good job here! I really did enjoy it, it was well written. Couplets are an interesting format to employ. ~Allan Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
you did a great job portrying your emotion in this piece and i really liked the ending. great job. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Keep dreaming pal.....sometimes that's all we ever have. I got my dreams and I hold them so tight I think i've suffocated a few by now Great poem. You wrote this extremely well.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
this needs to be on page one as i really enjoyed this poem first time around...  ...?if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Nice poem Chas. It definitely made me sit back and look at a few things in life itself. Thanks for the read. ~AF~ " Your mother's in here with us Karras. Would you like to leave a message? I'll see that she gets it." |
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Suga_Baby Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380Maine, USA |
OMG this is so wickedly cool haha WICKED.. sorry, it's a Maine thing Wicked good job!  "A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep." |
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chas Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 101Lynn, ma |
for all of those who missed out on this one, i'm bringing it back for a one night stand.. Humm……..chocolate |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
Superb!!!! I absolutely loved this one..this also related so much to the way i am and i love it when i can find poems that relate to my life So keep on dreaming! |
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ethel lahootie Member
since 2001-03-06
Posts 143SC, USA |
i thought this was really good...i enjoyed it! GOOD JOB  ~jO~ |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
excellent post. Stay dreaming as much as you can  thanks for the most beautiful read keep sharing "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
this is really great.....yes, keep dreaming, sometimes they come true SEA |
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vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
Wow!!! This is really good, I love the way you wrote this, and the point that you were trying to make. Great work, into my library it goes. Keep posting! ~*Nikki*~ ~*Of all the millions of people in the world, I'm just me.*~ |
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Pixie-Babe03 Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387Central Maine |
i had never read any of your work before but this was enough to make me go looking for more! this is great, beautifully written. Can't wait to read more! *Justine* -=Love starts with a SMILE, grows with a KISS, and ends with a TEAR=- |
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knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
ok that was awesome! i loved it!!!!!!! great work! thankies to whoever bumpeds it tiff  “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
*bump*page one i bumped it...and i bumped it and i bumps it again yay!! ...?if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry" |
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artemis_selene Junior Member
since 2001-05-07
Posts 14virginia |
wow, this was pretty deep.... writing your thoughts down can be good therapy, so keep on truckin. |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Great job on this one chas! "Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle" Plato. |
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lonely*soul Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396east haddam (moodus) ct :) |
wow!!!! i like this one alot..it hit me at the end..i dunno y..but its the poem that has most gotten my attention today..maybe b.c its such a true meaning...eh..i dunno but awsome job...i love it@! *KiMMiE* |
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lonely*soul Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396east haddam (moodus) ct :) |
hit the library button kim! urgh! |
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chas Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 101Lynn, ma |
thanks, it is so sweet of you all, and thanks anonymous albert, everyone take care of them self and peace out. |
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