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Teen Poetry #4
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Hate
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Hate |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia 
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Hate is an empty being. Hate smells like stagnant water in a dirty pond. Hate looks nondescript, but leaves you with a lingering sense that you have attended a funeral, and that you are the only one there to leave flowers and sign the dove-white coffin. Merely brushing against Hate leaves a gritty taste in your mouth like sand between your teeth after being pushed down on the playground. You know you have encountered Hate, not just Dislike or Indifference, when you hear the silence. It is the tense non-sound like the sound lurking in the barrel of a cocked gun. That is when Hate has entered your life. One day, you come upon Hate, broken and battered in an alley. You know that to heal Hate, you need many things: a helping hand, to sit him up and brush the bully's dirt off his jacket; a kind word, to add signatures to the bare casket of his heart; a gentle smile, to wash away the built-up scum and angry thoughts. But most of all, you need courage. The courage to place your hand over the mouth of the gun, to push it down, and make it drop to the earth; To shatter the silence - not with screaming bullets, but with the surrender that makes Hate what he is. When you help Hate to his feet, he looks different from the Hate you encountered before. You suddenly recognize him and are filled with warmth, Because, while Hate takes on many forms, Love is always the same. --Marie "Hope is a thing with feathers that perches in the soul." --Emily Dickinson [This message has been edited by Fading Away (edited 04-08-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Jennifer Floyd - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Marie... let me take a minute to regain myself... I do believe this is the best poem you have ever written... It made me sit back and shiver... I can't exactly give you an excellent reply right now, or anything completely analytical. Ok... breathe Allan... breathe boy... You described the emotion fantastically... everything about this poem is absolutely perfect. Your best, perhaps the best... I am adding it to my library, of course... but it really deserves a library of its own. Excellent job. Truly excellent. I can't say much more than that... ~Allan The sun was born, so it shall die. ~VNV Nation, "Further" |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Breathe Allan... and hit the button...  |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
OMG.....this was simply amazing. One of the best poems I have read here. VERY VERY well done Marie. I am amazed.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Linc
since 2001-03-07
Posts 552The Backstreet Boy |
Hey, I am speechless so I will touch up and old replie to fit this poem.Yet another superb poem. It will no doubt grace a top spot in my library. Your poetry is extremely good. You' re extremely good. I hope continue to grace passions's forms with your excellent work. It brightens my day to see such superb work by a talented young mind.Until your next masterpiece -- Linc "Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment." |
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Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
dot dot dot . . . *coughs* dot...dot dot...........  ~ One speechless little girl NOTE TO SELF: Live to love and love to live. |
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I only submit songs Junior Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 16NY,NY |
speechless |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
yup still speechless  |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Carly, I only submit songs and anonymous, you're all sheep.  Marie, you never cease to amaze me. This description of hate made me sit here in total silence for a few minutes and take note of what you really were saying. Hate isn't all bad though. It does help you to figure things out. Love, by the way, does take many forms but this isn't the place to go into that. I was extremely impressed with these lines: "To shatter the silence - not with screaming bullets, but with the surrender that makes Hate what he is." You're a brilliant writer and you should be quite proud of what you have just written. Keep 'em coming, Marie. ~AF~ Death is delightful. Death is dawn, the waking from a weary night of fevers unto truth and light. |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
Excellent poem!! I must agree w/ Allan, this is your best. Keep writing. *~*Me*~* |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
I don't have the words to justify how beautiful this poem is. your writng always amazes me and leaves me in awe of your talent. Don't ever stop sharing the wonderful gift you have in your writing. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
This poem rules... let's all get a chance to see it. |
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fozzyozzy Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336Lessburg Virginia |
Wow. Just wow. I'm really curious of what your inspiration for this poem was. I always wonder what poets are doing before they write their famous pieces. I've seen your works before, but this one just blows me away with the powerful personification. I'm trailing off here. Good(no excellent)job "The heart can think of no devotion |
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LoneWolf Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 384IL |
WOW. i really, really, really, really, really liked this one alot. i don't know what else to say that hasn't already been said. WOW again. this is definatly going in my library. this is just WOW. It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that. |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
A good definition of "passions in poetry" amazing ~*applauds*~ "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
This poem is just beautiful. I have to say it is your best. Wonderful job. Keep it up. *If the only place I can live my dreams is in my sleep, then I'll sleep forever!* |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
this deserves 2 be on page one.. as i'm stillspeechless..hehe  ...?death is not the greatest loss in life. the greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live. -norman cousins |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
I just feel like knocking this one back up to page one. And rereading it. Again. This one deserves it! *~*Amanda*~* |
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knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
thanks for bumpin it guys this was like WOW....never seen nething like it but im also pretty new with all this. great job!!!!!!! this is going to my library! tiff  “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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knightlyshadows Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791obscured vision |
darn it allan ur rubbin off on me!  forgot to hit the button grrrr@me tiff “A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.” |
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Shygirl82 Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245Ilinois |
Wow this is one of the best poems I have read. It also made me take a moment and think. Simply amazing. I too wondered what your inspiration for this magnificent piece was. ~Nikki~ |
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Jenn Cirrincione
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107Fl |
This really was well done. It was great... Everyone said everything there is to say... I applaud you. Jenn "I've come too close to happiness, to have it swept away,don't think I can take the pain, never fall again..." Janet |
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lonely*soul Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396east haddam (moodus) ct :) |
all i have to say is WOW i really like this...awsome job!!! *KiM* |
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JBaker515
since 2001-02-28
Posts 458Dartmouth College |
Marie.. this was amazing.. its the best poem i have ever read from you!! i loved it!!! $ Jeff $ : ) |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Heh! Wow.. Thanks everyone so much for the replies! It means a lot to me --Marie Don't ever be someone's slogan, because you are poetry. |
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Linc
since 2001-03-07
Posts 552The Backstreet Boy |
Hey, I am going through all of your poems and picking my favorite you know why  and I noticed I have missed a few so expect them to pop up soon. Anyways this is a very powerful poem I truly enjoyed reading it. This is one of the ones I pick. Until your next masterpeice -- Linc "Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment." |
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Linc
since 2001-03-07
Posts 552The Backstreet Boy |
OOPS sorry[This message has been edited by Linc (edited 05-08-2001).] |
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Hacas Junior Member
since 2001-05-05
Posts 25 |
GGGreat poem!...Me like!  Keep up the good work! "Fight for what you believe in" |
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vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
Well I definitely agree with all the other replies, this poem is simply AMAZING. I pretty much LOVED it, and think it is one of the best poems I have ever read on here. A true amazement, and a masterpiece for sure. This is going in my library, and I will be be looking out for more of your work. I'm so impressed. ~*Nikki*~ ~*Of all the millions of people in the world, I'm just me.*~ |
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