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Teen Poetry #4
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Of Men 'the title needs work badly'
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Of Men 'the title needs work badly' |
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Poet on Acid Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 325Florida, USA |
Security More elusive than purity Both illusions here Nothing is real only the fear Those who flaunt their power Remain locked in their minds and cower Feeling the seeds of fear Making there eyes tear They can’t see what’s real Or remember how to feel The few remaining pleasures of life All they see in this world is strife Blinded by the ‘light’ Casting them into the darkest of night Because of this they can not see The reality of the word ‘me’ The fear brings pain And those it does not drive insane It darkens, as the light goes out And drains their souls with unending drought >¶Øʆ< |
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| © Copyright 2001 Tony Ryan Johnson - All Rights Reserved | |||
Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Okay, the English language needs MORE words that rhyme with "life." All agreed please raise a hand? I've seen two poems today and written one, all using the word "life" and rhyming it to "strife" because it's just so hard to do! *pouts* I'll digress from that fact... Very original format in this piece, POA. I like the way you changed the length of the lines just a bit to create an odd flow. It worked out to be a great poem. ~Allan Its rather handy being at the top of the food chain...you can sort things out and not get the blame for it. ~~Elizabeth Johnson (anonymousfemale) |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
hey koool!there was rythming! something i could never do. great work! regina a small cut is only the beggining of a life in pain |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
*Raises hand* "Those who flaunt their power Remain locked in their minds and cower Feeling the seeds of fear Making there eyes tear" Very nice job here, POA. I like the structure of the poem. Nicely done. --Marie It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. |
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Poet on Acid Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 325Florida, USA |
Actually there are a pretty good amount of words that rhyme with 'life'..only thanx to the moderators I tend to shy away from using those words in poems I post here. Thanx for your replies. >¶Øʆ< |
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Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
OoooOOOooOOhhh Poet, me liked this VERY much....yep...VERY much......nice work, as always..keep writin'. ~Carly Many miles behind my eyelashes, there always seems to be |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I liked this one Acid......very nice  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
your poems are pretty much philosophical you are very talented keep sharing it's nice too see you around again "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
i somehow missed this the first time around and i'm glad that it was brought back up to the surface. beautiful work as usual POA, the flow is great and the poem is very well written. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
::raises hand:: I agree w/ Allan, but unfortunately, there arent that many, and yet you still wrote a great poem. Good job!! *If the only place I can live my dreams is in my sleep, then I'll sleep forever!* |
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