Teen Poetry #4 |
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Pretty young girl |
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Hallucination Member
since 2001-03-18
Posts 419 |
Pretty young girl walking down the street with every step she takes, I can feel my heart beat. As she turns the corner she smiles at me I hear a vouce say, she's whats missing in me. Pretty young girl dressed in shinny red if she should slip away, I'd be better of dead. I see the ocean blue color in her eyes my heart starts to burn, she's always on my mind. Pretty young girl leaves a trail in the snow now just let me prove, that there's no reason to go. No matter how much it rains she always smiles just to see her happy, I will walk a thousand miles. |
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© Copyright 2001 Brian Eggertsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
Elvenblood Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409Maine, USA |
Wow, you have sch a talent. I love your work! you're going on my authors list!! "Some men see things as they are and say why. |
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Isabel Galaxia Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733 |
Wow, this is GREAT. I love the repetition. Good job ![]() Bel |
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Linc![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-07
Posts 552The Backstreet Boy |
Hey, Yeah, this is really good and I think your a great poet. I hope to see more of your poetry. Until next poem -- Linc "Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment." |
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Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
This one was not as good as some of your others, but I did like the poem. Hope to see more. ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Fading Away![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Another outstanding poem from you! I'm impressed! Great work. --Marie I never thought that you would ever be the one to let me down. I guess that just goes to show how wrong I always am. |
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Allan Riverwood![]() ![]()
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Pretty young girls tend to do this to a person. What is it about pretty young girls? ![]() And did you mean "attractive young girl," or "moderately young girl?" This kinda ruined the whole poem for me. ![]() Clear this up for some of us! ~Allan If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort |
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Acies![]()
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Very uplifting poem actually easy to read, not like the rest I've read today i like it alot good job "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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