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Teen Poetry #4
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| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Empty tears Member
since 2001-03-12
Posts 64 |
Do they see me weeping i am lying at their feet they must not see me weeping for they dont look back as they leave they are much too busy they dont have time to stop and see everything thats happening or the pain inside of me no they do not love me they dont have the time to start but they allways seem to have the time to stick daggers in my heart |
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| © Copyright 2001 Brittany Mcpeak - All Rights Reserved | |||
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shadowmere Junior Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 11Ohio, USA |
powerful...but think....rather than wondering if they love you....wonder why you would want them to if they can walk away so easily. Well done.  Can it be so that you’ve been so ignorant or am I just another soul, in loves mad torrent? |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Hmm... I'll have to say that I agree with Shadowmere. Although I am making the assumption that this person would be doing such a thing knowingly. Does he/she know how you feel? Or is this person walking away without noticing the daggers in your heart? Nicely done. ~Allan If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort |
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Dark Enchantress Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258meet Morgana |
Superb  Some people are worth fighting for, some people are worth fighting, and some people should be nothing more than a first glance. You decide. and in the end we still pretend the time we spend not knowing when we're finally free and you could be -NIN "The Wretched" Angel of Darkness |
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WaitN4AnAngel Junior Member
since 2001-03-08
Posts 37I wish I knew where I was... |
Another excellent post. Just wondering who this is refering to? My guess is that it could be a lot of people. But just what I think. Anyways, keep it up! *Me* *If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything* *A smile is a curve that straightens out a lot of things* |
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Tears of Glass Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 182Physically? VA.... Mentally? I'm not quite sure |
this is another good poem. Well done. *Jennifer "My nightmare isn't fearing what I dream... It's waking up, knowing what I'll see." |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I thought this was ok. I think that you have great thoughts here and I look forward to seeing more of you.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Silver Butterfly Junior Member
since 2001-03-13
Posts 42Between here and the end |
That poem was decent, but it had a really strong ending. Something that my poems have a tendancy to lack. You poetry always has a constant theme too and doesn't seem to skip through different topics alot. Congrats. Ciao |
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Elvenblood Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409Maine, USA |
I'm so sory to hear about that! It's so powerfully moving! Wow...I hope you find happiness, a witer of such peotry must deserve to be happy. "Some men see things as they are and say why. I dream things that never were and say why not." ~RFK |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
This is a very moving poem Such imagery it's put in my imagination hope things are better thanks for sharing "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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fozzyozzy Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336Lessburg Virginia |
You start out mysterious and wandering but you definitely finish strong. Good job. "The woods are lovely, dark, and deep |
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Voiceless Senior Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 686Under the stars upon the wind |
Sadly enough this is realistic.. well done a powerful point made
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