Open Poetry #12 |
The Talk |
inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
You woke to the sound of rain Rain has taken the sun hostage again Again you are letting darkness control Control of your mind heart and soul Sit down its time we had a talk Talk sitting down not as we walk Walk will not let me see your eyes Eyes looking in the heart can’t tell lies The time has come you must face the light Light will set you free so in life take flight Flight dark thoughts so I can start my day Day here I am and the mirror I put away |
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© Copyright 2001 Toni Culberth - All Rights Reserved | |||
Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
love it inot2b..nicely done ~V~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Excellent poem, inot2B. I like the style very much of beginning the line with the word ending the preceding line....very powerful. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Very well done! |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
Victoria * Balladeer * suthern * Thank you all for taking the time to read. It is always nice to know someone out there sees my words. |
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mark woolard Member
since 2001-01-02
Posts 143 |
i dig the structure. think i'll rip it off. (: emotionally, i can relate. it feels like finally stepping out of a state of being that has consumed much too long. it feels like being able to take things into perspective, enabeling yourself finally make the proper choice(s). |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
Thank you Mark, today is the day I decided to get up and face the world. Ok the truth is I haven't made it out the door, but at least I know it is time. |
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Poeminister Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862Regina SK; Canada |
inot2B, Wonderful piece. Enjoyed the read. Poeminister "...no single sound too rude upon thy slumber shall intrude, Our thoughts, our souls- O God above! In every deed shall mingle, love." -Poe |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
inot2B~ I like this style.......I'll have to give it a go.......loved the ending!! -SEA |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
inot2B~ Great piece, I loved it A lot said in this...well done Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
very cool interesting style.. i'll have to give it another read wheres that library button.... hugs, g "oh baby baby, its a wild world..its hard to get by just upon a smile..." cat stevens |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
INot2B~ What a reflective endeavor. I also am intrigued by the form. Very nice. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Nicely penned INOT2B... I enjoyed reading your poem... ~coco~ You get a lot more lesson mileage when you lose in some situations than always win... |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
the sun indeed waits inot2B. . . come out and take a look. . . excellent. . . --------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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