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Meadowmuse
Member Elite

since 1999-12-27

Posts 3263

0 posted 2001-02-12 02:47 PM

Ophelia Adrift

Adrift, abed this thick'ning murk
where chaos flows to left and right.
Affixed, my gaze on reason's lurk,
'neath raging flames of starling night.

Fair shoulders steep in flowered stream,
caressed by black and olive grass.
No more to dance, no more to dream,
in deepest sleep doth silence pass.

As velvet leaves through foamy lace
cling sweet, soft petals 'pon my throat.
Spread swirling hair from sorrow's face,
pray far from me shall madness float.

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau

Nate Dogg
Senior Member

since 1999-11-15

Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton

1 posted 2001-02-12 03:00 PM

Very abstract poem....Meadow...brilliant write!

Nathan

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

2 posted 2001-02-12 03:15 PM

this has such a flowing rhythm....and it likes me very much....

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

3 posted 2001-02-12 04:14 PM

pray far from me shall madness float.
Indeed...smiling again claire...have an x boyfriend who called me ophelia...lol...gonna keep this one for the library not just because of that memory's sake...but also because it's beautiful!

" Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go."
T.S. Eliot

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

4 posted 2001-02-12 06:44 PM

*sigh*. . . you always could make me sigh Clarie. . . this is no exception. . . it's just so. . . you. . .

excellent my friend. . .

-------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Meadowmuse
Member Elite

since 1999-12-27

Posts 3263

5 posted 2001-02-12 07:38 PM

Nathan, abstract? Yes, to a strong degree it is. Brilliant? I doubt it, but you're awfully nice for saying so.

Thank you!

Sunshine, thanks! I'm glad my poem likes you. I think you're pretty neat too.

serenity, and did you call him Hamlet? I'm honored to have a poem in your library. Thank you, Madam.

Sven, making you sigh makes me sigh.

Thank you.

Claire

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau

Dr.Moose1
Member Elite

since 1999-09-05

Posts 3448
Bewilderment , USA

6 posted 2001-02-13 07:19 PM

Meadowmuse,
As always I'm late with the comments , but allow me to say thanks . Oh , and I took your advice although I haven't screwed up the courage to post there yet ( guess you could call me the cowardly moose ). Big happy fan here .
Doc

Severn
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-17

Posts 7704

7 posted 2001-02-13 07:26 PM

Just gorgeous...flows like a river as usual..

one small thing - I am not sure that 'thick'ning' really requires the apostrophe (not sure of the literary term)

K

...and I have found that a lifetime can be lived in one moment...

T.G.M.

Secret Whisper
Member

since 2001-01-25

Posts 298
Through the Looking Glass

8 posted 2001-02-13 07:38 PM

What a wonderful write, and to think I just stumbled upon it. Magnificent imagery. I greatly enjoyed this! Beautiful.

~Alison~

"Close your eyes, and you'll see. Cover your ears, and you'll hear."

Alwye

Moderator

Member Elite

since 1999-06-16

Posts 3850
In the space between moments

9 posted 2001-02-13 09:36 PM

Incredible imagery here...I could vividly picture the whole scene. I loved the flow and the whole feel of this, oustanding my friend!

*Krista Knutson*

I'm a slow dying flower
In a frost-killing hour
The sweet turning sour and untouchable...
-Natalie Merchant

[This message has been edited by Alwye (edited 02-13-2001).]

Meadowmuse
Member Elite

since 1999-12-27

Posts 3263

10 posted 2001-02-15 10:49 PM

I'm sorry to have come late to thank you all, but I'm trying to catch up with many things at once right now.

Doc, smiling at your "cowardly moose" ~ just hold your breath and do it. You'll be fine, I promise. (o:

Severn, thank you very much for reading this so carefully. I can't say that I'm positive that it requires the apostrophe either. Mostly I used it to make reference to a nonspoken syllable, to allow the line to scan in agreement with the rest of the poem. I do that, from time to time, though I know the skilled reader (such as yourself) would be able to discern where the syllable "shouldn't" be, it's more of an assistance method than anything else. Thanks again for your thoughts about this poem.

Secret Whisper, thank you. I'm happy you stumbled my way (smile) and that you enjoyed my poem. Nice meeting you. (o:

Krista, many thanks to you, dear. I'm sorry I haven't had more time to respond to your work. I always look for your pseudonym when I come, though, and have enjoyed everything of yours I've been able to read so far. You have a fine ear for poetry, you know. Take care (o:

Claire

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau

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