Writing rhymes in the park

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Open Poetry #11

Writing rhymes in the park

Nate Dogg
Senior Member

since 1999-11-15

Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton

0 posted 2000-11-21 05:38 PM

I'm sitting in the quietest section of the park,
hoping to finish this piece, before dark
as the sun was setting across the horizon,
shining and blazing,
with a view, that was amazing.
Plenty of people were in the area,
walking their pit-bulls and terriers,
as all the stray cats, were filled with hysteria.
Teenagers were on the court shooting hoops,
as drug-dealers, swarmed around the benches,
trying to make some quick loot.
Bums were slumped across the picnic benches
as they smelled of piss, and other sour stenches.
In the distance, I could hear classial music,
from the rehearsals, of the school of acoustics.
Rap music, was blasting from cars very loud,
as the owners of the cars, gathered in crowds,
smoking weed and puffing heavy smoke clouds.
It was about 7:30, as nightime came calling
as I gathered my thoughts for a final rhyme
because, I was surely running out of time.
I tried and tried to think harder
and I still came out with nada
so I just gathered my things
and left the park, with an idle heart,
and said "hello", to mother of dark.

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

1 posted 2000-11-21 06:44 PM

Nate,
Well you took me on a trip, and I enjoyed it.
Nice work.

Nate Dogg
Senior Member

since 1999-11-15

Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton

2 posted 2000-11-22 12:19 PM

Thank you Seymour, for your nice post.

Nathan

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

3 posted 2000-11-22 02:06 PM

Very nice Nate...in the park in the cool of the evening...James

Nate Dogg
Senior Member

since 1999-11-15

Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton

4 posted 2000-11-25 11:43 AM

Thank you James for responding to my poem!

Nathan

Charisma

Member Ascendant

since 2000-09-30

Posts 5906
lost in blue pages

5 posted 2000-11-25 11:59 AM

Great Nate...this trip in the park....truly loved and enjoyed it.....it was a great imagery.

Charisma

Nate Dogg
Senior Member

since 1999-11-15

Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton

6 posted 2000-11-26 05:04 PM

Thank you Charisma, for your wonderful comments!

Nathan

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.