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Open Poetry #11
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To be continued...
| Open Poetry #11 |
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To be continued... |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium 
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Under the dark lights of the moonless night feeling feverish - despondent duress! Struggle within hurts as a chasm opens sucking rapidly - punishing heartbreak! Unspoken words wound more than the ones told, Unseen scenes seem to show even more agony than the ones in view! How hopelessly true! Pulling him under the stilted silence... He moves and pushes and smiles to hide pain; He wears a disguise as he waits yearning; He pretends false joy as his shadows fail; He speaks of future as his present dies. His story will remain to be continued, As life will go on to be continued - In speechless silence in settled stillness in stubborn sorrow. To be continued... [This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (edited 01-04-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Unspoken words wound more than the ones told, Unseen scenes seem to show even more agony than the ones in view! How hopelessly true! Pulling him under the stilted silence... ============================ now who is being brilliant ... there is SO much wisdom and truth in that verse... soulful poem Sud ... filled with deep expressions and emotions .. "In speechless silence in settled stillness in stubborn sorrow. To be continued..." "in stubborn sorrow" ... what a cool phrase that is Sud, yes...it is indeed to be continued... maybe you can rewrite the ending with hindsight. take care wise one jm Am I loved by my words Will my vows weather the tide Bended knees can forsee all the rhythms of life And a heart can be held without pride ~Vante |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Unspoken words wound more than the ones told, How true!! This has much wisdom... well done! |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Sudhir, this is wonderful writing  Nice to see you again btw I have to agree with JM, these lines.... Unspoken words wound more than the ones told, Unseen scenes seem to show even more agony than the ones in view! How hopelessly true! Pulling him under the stilted silence... so much truth! Loved it Suddi  Maree I need a lullaby a kiss goodnight Angel sweet love of my life Oh, I need this ~Natalie Merchant~ |
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HiddenSparklez Member
since 2000-12-29
Posts 190British Columbia, Canada |
Wow, could there be enough wisdom in this poem?!?! These are the kinds of poems i love the most because no matter what age you are, you're always learning something every single day. |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Sudhir, if the continuance is as cool as part one I may have to get a heater and it's 30 degrees (damn hot) over here. write on Kethry Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen. |
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BloomingRose Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092Florida |
This really hits home. Struggles within can pull at your soul and mind, and yet we carry on as if all is well. Good write. Deb |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
His story will remain to be continued, As life will go on to be continued - In speechless silence in settled stillness in stubborn sorrow. To be continued... I hope that this one is a trilogy at least, Sudhir another gem from your ever flowing poetic fountain, I look forwards to parts 2 and beyond. There's a feeling of contentment Now that you are here I feel satisfied I belong inside Your velvet heaven" Depeche mode |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Whew...this one packs a suttle punch and leaves the reader wanting more...great write |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Such power in these words! It spoke to me - I hope it is continued, would like to read more! |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
Sudhir, This is amazing. I have a friend who is suffering from a broken heart. The man she loves lives in Pakistan and she, here in the United States. She is in pain and your words tell much about that kind of pain. Thank you for sharing this with us. "Every man dies. Not every man truly lives." Braveheart Kathleen |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
This is why you will always be one of my favorites my friend. You not only pen poetic grace and perfection but you do it in a way to leave us with a feeling as if we have just step up into the light of realization. Excellent write my friend. |
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Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
A Well-written piece and wonderful poem! Nathan |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Thank you all, my dear friends... sort of revisiting my 'own' library... and see that I have not even thanked you all... sorry about that... Regards to all, sudhir |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
wow! wonderful work! |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
thanks a lot... regards sudhir |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
one of your best hugs to you enjoyed |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Thanks Vandana... regards, sudhir |
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