Open Poetry #11 |
the unwatched pot |
Stan Member
since 2001-01-01
Posts 120Inland Empire Southern California |
sometimes when I’m taken by the beauty of a lovely thing deep in my mentality a certain strange vitality will push to override my random thought then swelling in reality, still distant from totality I'11 comprehend an embryonic plot that grows to actuality with easy informality in ways these things, I’m sure, are never taught first a flow of lyric chatter comes to play a pitter-patter so like a throbbing drumbeat on my mind and words in tumbled timing to unconscious form and rhyming are a mist that starts to shape into design gentle lines then start to dawn that each the following will spawn and bring another one to birth as racing senses fan ahead to scan the wordy watershed while sorting out alternatives of worth til soon the thoughts are growing warm in sweeping words of ending form that clarify the drift... and I’ve been lent a special gift 'twas like an unwatched pot that boiled until the story was uncoiled to usher limp, my body back to earth. |
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© Copyright 2001 Stan Colburn - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
What a really wonderful way to describe the poetic process!! Stan, this is great....I love your style!! Write on! -<--<--{(@ |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
Wow! outstanding work here! enjoyed reading! -Tier |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
This pot is bubbling away and I loved the rhythm and flow of the words...makes me wish I had thought of it! Great! |
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Gemini Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203Wisconsin, USA |
Stan-I like your style, alot of thought can be had from your words. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
This is great, Stan...loved the flow of simmer to boil here...looking forward to reading more! Enjoyed muchly. |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
great lines, flow, rhythm, meter, imagery, metaphor... this poem ROCKS!!! .... looking forward to reading more from you.... "and words in tumbled timing to unconscious form and rhyming are a mist that starts to shape into design" love those lines, especially... all of it's really good... i enjoyed the incorporation of interior rhyme within the lines, as well... this is a song..... |
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Stan Member
since 2001-01-01
Posts 120Inland Empire Southern California |
Doreen, Serenity, Gemini, Sunshine, Tiersdin, and Sunny. Thank you all so much. I've tried to audit your classes too and will need time to get better at replies. This forum is just a revelation to me. So many talented and lovely people. Thanks again. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Stan--Love the way you use words...and through them into the pot and they come out smelling so sweet...enjoyed your poem very much. |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
and words in tumbled timing to unconscious form and rhyming I too enjoyed the rhyme and meter of your tumbled timing..and if unconscious..WOW..is all I can say.. ~softsmiles ~Wynter "The worst prison would be a closed heart". ...Pope John Paul II |
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Daniel J D Senior Member
since 2000-10-01
Posts 1471Hillcrest, Queensland, Australia |
Stan, very well done, send more please. Respond to my call and let the waves of my heart fill your life with the wonders of love (Daniel J D) |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
More excellent work...I just don't have the words to say anything else. Can I be your willful breeze, Come to touch, Your heart to ease? |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
yeah I love these lines...they sound soooo familiar...wonderful done Charisma |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
this is VERY original!! "Every man dies. Not every man truly lives." Braveheart Kathleen |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Yep great! |
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