Open Poetry #11 |
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The Taken Soldier |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair ![]() |
It's about how soldiers wont be home for Christmas, enjoy, all aspects of criticism is wanted. The Taken Soldier The dark overcast sky on this formidable day Captures an inanimate soul and takes him away The war calls left his sobbing family astray For if his life is seized, someone will pay An unholy battlefield of vengeance dwells Bullets and cannons blacken the light sky Soldiers conglomerate in death holes below Bodies are slaughtered as one by one they die The general shouts loud, "Fire! Mow them down!" "Like a scythe?" asks a soldier from the ground "Tear them up good! Leave not one soul alive!" Like lemmings they did 'til backup arrived They lined the enemy up, all the rank and file Machine guns exploded, not one in denial Not many survived back to camp to write back home Some barely clenched an eye as enemies did roam "Dear Mother," a letter was started so soft But soon grew harsh as it described the war Weary grew the soldier, the letter he tore For it was a little too gruesome to be sent aloft The days of holiday soon became so near Seperated from his family, and full of fear He started a new letter of sadness and tear A Christmas without love, he couldn't bare As the time became thin, the war seemed ending It seemed so right for this event to start mending The treaty was signed, and the battles forgotten So many dead bodies were left to become rotten A family is reunited under the mysterious sky The letter came soon after, saying he might die Inside was a death note, and doubt he would last "Mourn for me not, but don’t leave me in the past." Jeremy D. Raulinaitis 12/00 "...if you've never met me, then you've no right to judge me. I have a good heart, but this heart can get ugly." ~DMX~ |
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© Copyright 2000 Jeremy Daniel Raulinaitis - All Rights Reserved | |||
Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Jeremy...such a very strong and powerful image I get from this...thank you for rminding us that there are those who cannot be home for the holidays because the risk their lives to keep us safe |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Jeremy, this poem is special... You had me teary-eyed while I became immersed in the poem... Absolutely a great write and I thank you for sharing it... ![]() ![]() |
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Charisma![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
a war is incredible....and you have penned it very well. heartfelt piece. Charisma |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
thanks! thanks for all the replies, let your voice be heard. jeremy r |
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