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Open Poetry #11
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a psalm of hurt
| Open Poetry #11 |
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a psalm of hurt |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
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I wanted-- write a psalm of hurt... I wanted you to feel... words in motion still inert I wanted...wanted you, to FEEL... I DID---I wished upon you, pain... I wished you'd feel sleepless refrain of every night my heart's remains-- pumping blood a sprinkles' vein... like a sexton's soaker hose beneath no garden grown... I should have felt some joy, I think - to see you begging on your knees... I should have felt some thing at least - but oh...I felt? I feel...alone... [This message has been edited by serenity (edited 12-13-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
"like a sexton's soaker hose beneath no garden grown..." Ok it fits the psalm part really good....I love how this one starts, it hooks the reader right away because the direction it's going invokes the need to see it to the end... love the title because that's the way you wrote it in prayer form with melody....very good stuff .....keep it up Celeste!! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I wanted-- write a psalm of hurt... I wanted you to feel... words in motion still inert I wanted...wanted you, to FEEL... I DID---I wished upon you, pain... I wished you'd feel sleepless refrain of every night my heart's remains-- pumping blood a sprinkles' vein... like a sexton's soaker hose beneath no garden grown... ================== is it the pull of the moon ... mercury retro ...I dont know...all I know is once again ... Im reading thru a mirror ... you know ... I know ... oh no ... *sigh* ... I wish I thought it hurt the same for them ... ya know? yea, you know. hugs for this one baby ...as it goes in me keeper box and me heart love ya me Some people find subtlety in strangers if you find anything~let me in Your eyes~you see everything my eyes~I see it all together now~and I know |
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Masked Intruder
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231Near golden sunsets |
And that m'friend is why the pen is mightier than the sword. (In real life...a little secret...don't try to swordfight with a pen, you'll get yer but kicked.) You've got true power and feeling written all over, y'know? I don't know whether to be glad, sad, or ecstatic (because it's still snowing, *wink*) (I also mean about the poem, too). But the emotion is definitely there! |
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