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Open Poetry #10
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Thunderstorm (villanelle)
| Open Poetry #10 |
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Thunderstorm (villanelle) |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware 
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Thunderstorm Thundering, crackling flashing in the silent night Your presence I felt, heard, sought, wanted to be You visited, my senses you held on real tight Your teasing eyes, your lilting laugh delightful in my sight Bringing back sweet memories of days I used to see Thundering, crackling flashing in the silent night I looked for you, elusive you as you hid from the light You knew my thoughts, slipped my grasp you see You visited, my senses you held on real tight Floating on the air was, like lightning in the night As single entities we've blended poetry so free Thundering, crackling flashing in the silent night Weary though you may be at times you are a sight A pleasure you remain to me, you’re all you needs to be You visited, my senses you held on real tight So far the distance is between us, yet you’re within my sight To never to have known you, ‘twould be sad mystery Thundering, crackling flashing in the silent night You have your wings you’re free to fly, onward through the night But You seek shelter too, a haven from the sea You visited, my senses you held on real tight I'd bend my every effort; I'd fight the final fight To aid you in your distress if you made a call to me You visited, my senses you held on real tight Thundering, crackling flashing in the silent night Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least. ~ Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe ~ |
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| © Copyright 2000 Wilfred Yeats - All Rights Reserved | |||
Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
A picturesque villanelle, Wilfred. Well done. Elizabeth You cling to your ways and leave mine to me. Suum cuique. ~Elizabeth |
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SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~Oh WoW,...this poem has such energy. Incredibly written,...'You knew my thoughts, slipped my grasp you see',....soOo many outstanding lines. Enjoyed! *Peace. |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware |
Elizabeth- Thank you - I'm glad you enjoyed - as I certainly enjoy reading you Spitfire- I guess the repetition and the feel of a Thunderstorm - help convey energy - - It was a fun write ~S~ Thank you |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Much applause, my friend!! jwesley |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Wilfred, You have captured the storm beautifully my friend. It is a lovely sight indeed.  LW Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Bill--I really like this form and subject matter..well done! |
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Rainydays Member
since 2000-10-21
Posts 324 |
Wilfred, writing in true poetic form takes steady discipline. (or so I hear, lol) "Thundering, crackling flashing in the silent night" What a way to share the drama of a thunderstorm and a romance. I really enjoyed this. Rainydays |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware |
My apologies - to you all - and my thanks - I mistakenly created this with 2 too many verses - Mea culpa mea culpa mea maxima culpa |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
"So far the distance is between us, yet you’re within my sight" What a wonderfully descriptive piece Wilfred. Beautifully written with such tender thoughts ... just lovely! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Ron K. Fox Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925 |
the electricity, the raw power is expressed in this thundering love poem. No storm of the heart will pass unnoticed. Nicely done again Wilfred. Ron Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
'Tis a wonderfully crafted "expanded" villanelle..  |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
You write with such incredible energy and power...I can feel the thunder...taste the rain on my lips...wonderful |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
As far as I'm concerned you could never write too many verses. I loved every one of them Very thunderous emotions in your work Superb, just as it is Liz |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware |
Paula - Kit - Liz - all of you - Thank you all for your apprecition - I guess i'm my own worst critic - I'll see if I cant write another and do it right Thanks again |
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Greeneyes 
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
looking for the skies to rain, and rumble with thunder.....love this Bill.....*S* Greeneyes |
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