Open Poetry #10 |
Night Chills |
Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
In the air there's a chill Coming down from the hill Traveling across the plain Washing over me like rain I feel it on my skin Slowly it creeps in Penetrating my bones Like cold from Arctic stones A feeling I cannot shake My teeth chatter and quake As shivers travel my spine In the darkness no lights shine I sit here on this rock Silently taking stock Of what lies within Perhaps for a place to begin No end is in sight On this wintry night Snowflakes now fall As I listen for your call Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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© Copyright 2000 Jennifer L. Garcia - All Rights Reserved | |||
Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
This left me with a wonderful mysterious feeling. I like it! Kathleen |
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Rosebud1229 Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813North Carolina |
very nice lonewolf, the cold chill from the winter air, every word flowed so easily just as snowflakes fall magically as they hit the ground. |
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Gemini Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203Wisconsin, USA |
Lone Wolf-Nothing like waiting for a call from someone special to warm a chilly night. Very sweet poem, I liked. |
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Alan Senior Member
since 2000-09-12
Posts 1499right next door |
I liked the poem. I have sit out in the cold night air waiting for a call. |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Oh honey this is a sad and lonesome piece I hope all is well...you'll tell if it's not won't you. HUGS Love Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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White Wolf Member
since 1999-09-18
Posts 371Somewhere in the vast wasteland |
I like it. I just hope that I don't keep anyone waiting like that. The White Wolf |
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natelan Junior Member
since 2000-10-06
Posts 34Escondido, CA, USA |
*bows* I like your descriptive nature, very life-like... For better or worse, I really feel as though I am there with the subject of this poem. GREAT WORK!!! *bows* A man in a bubble is a man in trouble. |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Ahhhh those wintry nights LW! Nothing better to clear our heads than sitting out on a cold night as a gentle snow falls. Great piece. Bonnie |
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Robert Joseph Member
since 2000-10-07
Posts 491South Carolina |
Lone Wolf, Each word unfolded the essence of your title. Nicely done. Robert Joseph |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Kathleen . . . Oooh, I am mysterious now! I like that!! LOL. Thank you my friend. Rosebud . . . Thank you so much. What a lovely description! Gemini . . . Glad you liked it. Thanks for reading. Alan . . . Nice to hear that. Hope your call comes soon. Tracie . . . Yes, it is sad in a way and I was feeling a little lonesome when I wrote it. Things are okay here my friend. And you would know if they weren't. White Wolf . . . Thanks for reading. Just for the record no one was waiting. The end just kind of unfolded. natelan . . . Thanks for the compliments. I would welcome the company. Bonnie . . . So true!! It is so peaceful at times. Robert . . . Thank you for reading and for the compliments. I thought the title fit this one well. Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Time to get a place with a fireplace in it this was excellent work my friend and you continue to pour your heart and soul into your work...a wonderful sight to behold. Now grab that kitty and snuggle...you'll feel better |
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Eloise Senior Member
since 1999-11-27
Posts 1096Wyoming |
Wonderful rhyme and meter LoneWolf. The imagery is great on this. I can feel the lonesomeness. |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
BDC . . . You are right, always heart and soul. All that I have. The fireplace? Hmmm, sounds nice!! LOL. The kitty does not want to snuggle tonight, but that is okay. I will be alright. Thank you so much my friend. Eloise . . . Thank you for reading and the compliments. I have to admit the neter was accidental, but the rhyme was intentional. I try to do my best on the imagery. Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
Another great write, LW! Wonderfully illustrated! I love it!! sp Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: 'it might have been.' -John Greenleaf Whittier |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Snowpants, Happy to hear you liked this one. Thanks for reading! LW Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Wonderful imagery LoneWolf and lovely flow to your words. You had me chilling right along with you. Oh, I'm NOT ready for the snow yet though, but you've inched me closer, LOL! Best wishes, /Kit |
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