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Open Poetry #7
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Nate Dogg
Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton

0 posted 2000-06-07 05:37 PM


This some of my earliest work that really caught some people's eyes and let realize my skills as poet. I hope you all enjoy it.... especially the ones who never read it before!

I'm lying in this hospital bed,
with three bullets in my head
as the pain is tearing through my brain,
causing me to cry out to the Lord in vain.
I told the Lord that if he plans to take me,
then let me leave quietly.
I never thought that I would be,
on the recieving end,
of a bullet from my best friend.
We let money and women come in between
so therefore, there wasn't much trust between us.
Obviously, my friend needs to see a pschiatrist
and I never thought he was like this.
He was angel in disguise,
that unvieled his true identity
right before my own eyes.
This is the result,
of all those years he smoked crack.
I know that he wishes that,
he could have those years back
because all that crack,
flipped his brain like an acrobat,
and now he's trapped like Daniel,
was in the lion's den.
Because of him, my life's descending
and is close to an ending.
Before I go, I would lke to thank everybody,
who was positive and all the ones,
that really cared for me and loved me.
I hope you all stay strong,
reach mountain peaks and hold on.
At my last breath, I closed my eyes,
and told the world, my final goodbye.

 Nathan

© Copyright 2000 Nate Dogg - All Rights Reserved
Moon Dust
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177
Skelmersdale, UK
1 posted 2000-06-07 05:58 PM


I seem to be remembering that I did one simelar to it. I like it

 We are all poets, its just some people dont know it yet.

SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

2 posted 2000-06-07 06:11 PM


~Nate,...this is very chilling and gripping work here.  Wow,...this poem took me for a ride!  Such a tragic tale told in such a truly talented way.  Thanks for sharing it. *Peace.
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
3 posted 2000-06-08 05:55 AM


Excellent writing Nate...enjoyed reading this again.   James
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
4 posted 2000-06-08 06:35 AM


Nathan, my friend~
I may have missed this one the first
time around ... it tells a tragic tale.
I found it gripping.
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
5 posted 2000-06-08 06:51 AM


This was a powerful and thought-provoking verse Nate ... too often a tragedy repeated.  Well written!

Best wishes,
/Kit

sarahC
Member
since 2000-06-07
Posts 84
Michigan
6 posted 2000-06-08 08:39 AM


I really liked this poem Nate...too true of the world we live in today, power, women, money, greed, I'll have to give this topic some thought and do some writing on it myself,,,,nice work for sure!  
hippie_teen
Junior Member
since 2000-05-18
Posts 18
Escondido, CA, USA
7 posted 2000-06-08 09:52 AM


This is a wonderful poem, but more importantly, nice name!  Perhaps I'm bias, for my name too, is Nathan, but a great name none the less!  Your last name wouldn't happen to be, "hale," would it?  Just kidding, you are a far greater writer than Nathan Hale!
Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
8 posted 2000-06-08 10:41 AM


Nate~
Hi. I haven't ever read any of your
work before so thanks much for posting.
this is a VERY powerful piece of poetry
you have here. very intense, very real-
like. i felt like i was in the hospital
room with this person. excellent piece!!
take care,
amy  


 "Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends."

"Fate exists but it can only take you so far,
Because once you're there
It's up to you to make it happen."




Nate Dogg
Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton
9 posted 2000-06-08 04:59 PM


Thank you Maria, for your nice comments.
Thank you Spitfire, for wonderful comments.
Thank you James, for your great comments.
Thank you Marge, for your sweet comments.
Thank you Kit, for you great comments.
Thank you Sarah, for your good comments.
Thank you Nathan, for your comments and I'm sure that you're a great poet in your own right.
Thank you Aimster,
for your wonderful comments.

 Nathan

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