Open Poetry #7 |
healing |
danny Junior Member
since 2000-05-09
Posts 18 |
CHANGE what is that burning light oh so far away is it the end of darkness is it the break of day am i a newly planted seed who'll grow with suns first rays am i not that withered weed that once was on display am i the trickle of a stream who'll fill with all the rain and not the dusty river bed who thirsted for your name |
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© Copyright 2000 danny rowland - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Aye Danny, The light you see burning, ever so far away, Is a spot of sparkle in your life, That darkness would now go away, Taking take away reasons of strife. A dusty rived bed, maybe a withered seed, You may have probably once been, The rays will lighten you and fulfil your need, Her name will give you the elixir that changes the scene... ----- good work Danny, craving and longing is clearly discovered in your words... Be patient... Regards, sudhir In any moment of decision, The best thing you can do is the right thing, The next-best thing is the wrong thing, And the worst thing you can do is nothing. - Theodore Roosevelt |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Very picturesque Danny ... I loved the comparisons you used and could feel the "dusty river bed" drinking in it's long-awaited life force. Lovely poem! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Brandyn Sand Member
since 2000-04-21
Posts 82Columbia, SC |
Remarkable work! Twas so easy to see myself in the scene that you painted here. Effective meter, and I've always loved the 2/4 rhyming pattern. Outstanding!! |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Ah beautiful, this shows alot of strength I hope it stays with you Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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