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Open Poetry #7
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mete out
Member
since 2000-02-16
Posts 270
england

0 posted 2000-05-04 06:54 AM


All this time on my own makes me wonder,
My paranoia taking control,
I'm thinking about myself again,
about how I hate it all.
Colours flash through my skull.
I'm going nowhere and I'm getting there slowly.
Is this whereI'm going to be all my life?
I've messed it all up.
Still I'm holding on to a memory,
Maybe I'll be there again sometime never.
I'm getting vaguely hysterical,
THinking of you as always,
Doubt spreading thick across my mind.
I'm stuck in this rut.
Pleaes don't fill it in...
It's all goingtoo fast so slowly.
I'm counting down the days again.
How do I know if it's futile or not?
If I'm so smart why am I sitting here?
Motivation eludes me so I smoke my timwe away.
I'd better light up 'cos I'm doing nothing.
I have no expectations just a headache.

My brain gets stuck again.
I think of you and my mind flows faster than I can
   move my pen.
Daytime TV fills the hole where my IQ used to be.
I wish I was Marilyn,
But she was messed up too.
I try to visualise myself in 20 years time,
but all I see is fuzzy and black.
My naive mind plays around with images.
I feel so old,
but my inexperienced mind
and pre-f***ed body belie me.

I just want to be in a film,
"French Kiss", "Pretty in Pink", "Reality Bites".
I want to find accidental triumph,
have accidental accidents,
to have it all fade to black as I'm kissing my hero.
But it's all gone wrong,
It's all gone  abit "Rocky Horror...";
The glitter's gone and I'm all wet and smeary.

I've lost my way.
It's all started  to rot.
Frustration has set in.
Could you love me now?
Don't speak too soon; you haven't seen me for a while.
Fate does not exist, so whatcan I put all this down
   to?
I need to stop kidding myself-
But I'm still afraid to chuck in the towel,
Because all this pondering has made me think;
What if you DO love me?

< !signature-->

 I am not a preacher, I just speak the world as I see it.






[This message has been edited by mete out (edited 05-12-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Louise Parsons - All Rights Reserved
mete out
Member
since 2000-02-16
Posts 270
england
1 posted 2000-05-05 08:38 AM


cheekiness aside,
i'd like some people to read this.
i know it's long...


 I am not a preacher, I just speak the world as I see it.



infinat3 sadn3ss
Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 85
somerset england
2 posted 2000-05-05 03:43 PM


i dont know what to say about this one lou , fantastic ?, wonderful? , all a bit too shallow for me but , as normal i cant think of anything more fitting to say , how about...
...ironically elegant ???
the line "i want to find accidental triumph"is one of the most self explatainatory lines i have ever read , i know exactly what you meant
love ya

mete out
Member
since 2000-02-16
Posts 270
england
3 posted 2000-05-07 06:44 AM


***cabey,
you are never shallow...
everything you say is wonderful, you are always there for me with a good frame of mind.
you are so special to me cabes, i dont know what i'd do wih out you.
ironic elegence...i like it!


 I am not a preacher, I just speak the world as I see it.



mete out
Member
since 2000-02-16
Posts 270
england
4 posted 2000-05-12 06:40 AM


sorry to do this again...
it took me ages to type up...!

netswan
Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369
Washington
5 posted 2000-05-13 09:36 AM


Hi Mete -----this is a long poem and
an interesting read.
It leaves me wondering what to comment on.
For One I do believe in Fate.
I do believe that life is what you make
it -------and those accidental meetings
are usually not accidents.

Matching souls cross the universe.
Understand your time concept, waiting time
goes so slow ----yet, if you are going
to miss the bus that time just goes way
too fast.

So lots of similies in here -----and
I hear fear and frustration  - but
even if this one doesn't love you. Always
another love 'round the corner.  Because
when you visualize yourself 20 years older
---think far wiser, too ----
hugs from netswan

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