Corner Pub #2 |
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Sun Sleeper |
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Red_Feather Member
since 2001-01-19
Posts 131The Vagabond Sea |
Once I was a rock hopper doubling as a tree swinger content to be a time creeper Now wading through the rush living in a score keeper I've only room to be a sun sleeper I dared to be a cloud reader looked on into a stargazer but the city sky is empty so now I'm just a sun sleeper I thought I felt your breath I'm suddenly a sense leaper but it's only sun soaked air and in my soul I'm singing deeper One's not half two it's two are halves of one EE Cummings |
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© Copyright 2001 Ryan Redfeather - All Rights Reserved | |||
Xeonox![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
Interesting poetry. It rhymes, but no meaning to it? Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) |
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Xeonox![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
Interesting poetry. It rhymes, but no meaning to it? Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) I posted it twice on accident [This message has been edited by Xeonox (edited 05-22-2001).] |
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mistyrose Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 75state of anxiety |
red_feather i found this fascinating i like it... "and in my soul i am singing deeper" what a great line....good read thanks mistyrose~* |
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Joyce Johnson![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
I like this too. The rhyming is very interesting. Joyce |
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Trillium![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-09
Posts 12098Idaho, USA |
Really a different form, but enjoyable. Betty Lou Hebert |
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Moon Dust![]() ![]()
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177Skelmersdale, UK |
This is lovely maybe with a hidden meaning? Don't ever give in, if you do you've lost everything you've ever had and everything you hope to gain, but if you carry on your already winning. |
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Red_Feather Member
since 2001-01-19
Posts 131The Vagabond Sea |
Thank you all for reading and for the interesting comments. As far as meaning goes, yes there is one. This is about missing a place, a time, and a person from both. I would not expect that to be clearly seen thought. I try not to let perfect understandability influence what i really want to write. Thanks again for the diverse response, i am always amazed. One's not half two it's two are halves of one EE Cummings |
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Decaflame Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635 |
All of this likes me.... so much so, it's a keeper and headed for my library... |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
a really enjoyable read, yes the city is often barren compared to the country side. "across the unfair divide |
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Romy Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170Plantation, Florida |
I really liked this poem, I like the way it sounds when I read it out loud. It has a nice rhythmn to it! "I dared to be a cloud reader looked on into a stargazer but the city sky is empty" I thought these were interesting lines... Debbie |
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RebeccaJoy Junior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 35 |
This is outstanding. A very nice play on words while still holding the subject. |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
I felt this! |
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Red_Feather Member
since 2001-01-19
Posts 131The Vagabond Sea |
Romy - thanks, to read something out loud is usually how i tell when it is finished, when it sounds right. RebeccaJoy - You are too kind, and welcome to the pub. Irish Rose - thanks for reading and i'm glad you liked it. One's not half two it's two are halves of one EE Cummings |
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